


In Between Dreams

by Noji



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Adult Dipper Pines, Alternate Universe, M/M, Mafia AU, Witch AU, blowjob, eventual use of Dippers real name, gangster au, handjob, lots of dreams, mentions of death and torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2018-04-20 21:12:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 34,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4802366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noji/pseuds/Noji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We've met so many times, how come I still don't know your name?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chicago

The sweet autumn sun bathed everything in sight into a soft golden light, blurring on the dirt of the windshield in front of him.

Dipper let out a breath. The handcuffs on his wrist pushed uncomfortably into his flesh but he didn't bother to move his hand. It was pointless. His right hand was chained to his seat quite professionally.  
After hours of interrogation, sitting in this car all by himself was almost soothing. It was all going to be over soon anyway.  
He scanned the crowd every time a train arrived. Man with fancy coats, posh hats and fashionable woman flooded into the streets, but the man he was waiting for was yet to show up. As the sun traveled lower and the sun shone into his eyes more and more, his gut grew tight. It wouldn't take much longer now.

Finally, as the sun began to set, a familiar mob of blonde hair appeared among the other passengers.  
Dipper sighed and drew a deep breath back in to steel himself.

His partner was born to wear waistcoats and dress pants. He looked like the king of the world as he strolled towards the parking lots where they had agreed to meet. Before everything had gone so horribly wrong.

A few days back, a gang had identified him on the streets and thought of themselves as very clever to try and use him as a bait in a trap for his partner.  
Dipper set his teeth, trying his best not to show any signal of recognition. His eyes burned from not blinking as he waited for the blonde to make eye contact with him.

When he spotted his car and Dipper inside, a smile lit up his face. As he started to walk towards it, hands in his pockets and shoulders relaxed, Dipper did the only thing he could do and shook his head slowly, starring into the others eyes and praying that he would notice soon enough. And he did. Smile slipping of his face, the man starred at him, straightening his back. His face drained of all emotions and they shared a long look.

They wouldn't ever be able to say their goodbyes now. Both of them knew this.  
It was too early, there was too much left unsaid, too much left undone. Instead, Dipper smiled almost gentle. His face felt weird doing it, but it was the best way of showing that it was okay.  
Slowly, the blonde man turned away, as if lost in thought, and walked down the path into the other direction.

Dipper allowed his eyes to blink, to shed the tears that had gathered. He didn't dare to look left or right, in case someone was watching him. There was only one thing left to do. He looked onto the bomb in the foot well of the passenger seat. It was wired to all doors of the car.  
There was no way he would make it out of this alive. The gang members had tortured him already and only left him alive as a bait. If they ought to deem their plan had failed, they'd most likely kill him right here or later.  
Placing one hand on the handle of his door, he took deep breaths. The sound of the air rushing through his nose filled his ears until finally, with a scream, he pushed the handle down and forced the door open.

  
He didn't hear the explosion.

  
And he didn't hear the agonized wail of the blonde man down the road, pushing through the crowd that ran to see where the noise had come from, away from the burning wreck of his car and his dead lover.

-

Dipper awoke with a start, his heart pounding heavily in his chest.  
His eyes scanned the room and it took him long seconds to remember that he wasn't back in the forties, he was only a student. And he also wasn't ripped to pieces by a car bomb. The dreams he kept having were just so darn realistic every time.  
He sat up in his bed, finding comfort in the familiarity of his room. The dream had been intense. 

“And it was him again.” he breathed out into the silence. He blindly groped beside his bed for the notebooks scattered there until he found the right one to write his dream down.

Dipper had always had the wildest dreams, but for some time now one and the same man appeared again and again.  
And he had been the lover of this man yet again. Dipper felt his ears grew hot and rubbed his face. He wouldn't mind having a crush on a man if it wasn't a person his mind had completely made up without asking.  
He looked the same every time – tall, lean, blonde and always with a snarky smile on his sun-kissed face. It was unnerving. And oddly charming.  
Over the course of many dreams, Dipper had learned about his personality as well. Reckless, lacking empathy and weirdly enough, really affectionate towards him.

After he finished his notes and looked at them, he felt just as clueless as always. Even if the weird man had barely made an appearance, he had clearly been the center of the dream. Looking through the last pages of the notebook, there really was just one thing missing - a name for the mysterious stranger.

Of course he could always make one up. After all, it was just a strange bit of his overactive imagination. But it bothered him that his subconsciousness made up the weirdest scenarios but avoided using a name at all costs. The stranger had never even called him by his name either, bringing up ridiculous nicknames instead.

Throwing the notebook aside, Dipper got up to get ready for classes. Maybe he'd manage to ask the stranger in his next dream.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The car trap was loosely inspired from a scene from 'Catch me if you can'.  
> English isn't my first language, I hope it was okay.  
> The next chapters are well planned, I'm looking forwards to them.  
> Until then, thank you for reading so far!


	2. An Illuminati triangle with a tophat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dipper should be studying but instead he dreams again.

Dipper stared up into the blue sky above him, heaving a sigh. It was so peaceful. The weather was nice and he forest surrounding the clearing gave off the soothing sound of countless rustling leaves.

It took him solid minutes before he squinted his eyes and started to question the situation.

The sky was littered with tiny triangle clouds.

That was unusual.

Slowly it dawned to him that he must be dreaming. He blinked slowly, but he didn't wake up.

Very carefully he tried to move his arm and raised it above his head, wiggling his fingers. A sound of delight bubbled up his throat at that. He'd tried to practice lucid dreaming for a while now, and it finally worked.

He stood up and looked around. The shadows of the forest surrounding him were unnaturally dark, but he wasn't here to explore it. He wanted something else.

It had been weeks since a certain dream demon had bothered the Mystery Shack and all of the inhabitants were growing restless. Or maybe they were worn out from Dippers constant worrying. Anyway, they had expected another attack from the demon, but it never came.

Dipper just could not believe that the demon had just disappeared into thin air after bothering them in the beginning of the summer. He'd have to be defeated or else Dipper would not find any ease.

The first part of his plan had been to train himself to dream lucid, and now he only needed to get Bill to notice him.

Some minutes of starring at the trees passed in which Dipper tried to come up with something smart, until he gave up with a grumble and cupped his hands to his mouth, ready to call him the old fashioned way.

The name bubbled out of his mouth without a second thought.

“BILL! BILL?! SHOW YOURSELF!”

He waited, and the trees around him rustled scandalized at him. He continued shouting until a flash of light blended him and with a swirl, a small golden triangle appeared. Little black arms and legs dangled from it, a small black hat sitting on top and a tiny black bow tie just beneath one huge, single eye. Said eye looked around to examine the dream he was in, until it turned towards him

The boy looked baffled, hands still raised to his mouth from shouting. “It worked! You are here!”

“Quite right kid, I am! Good to see you developing a death wish!”

The delight over his success quickly faded and his smile fell. Bill on the other side seemed to be happy to see a frown on his face.

“Who said I had a death wish?”

Bill circled him until he came to a halt and leaned onto his cane towards him. “Why else would you let me into your dream? That's not very clever.”

Dipper narrowed his eyes. “You haven't shown up in a while. I want to know what you are plotting.”

Bill chuckled and began to circle him again, albeit slower this time. “So you thought you'd just ASK?” He let go of his cane, which stayed floating where it was as he held his belly, laughing like a maniac. “Pine Tree, you are hilarious!” He brushed away a tear and sighed. “Anyway, I have seen some disturbing things today. I really don't feel like playing with you meatbags today, so shoo now.” He waved a tiny hand at him.

Curiosity sparked over Dippers irritation like a flash. That was the last thing he'd expected to hear. “What? What on earth could possibly disturb _you_?” Over the last years he'd seen so many things that he wasn't easily surprised anymore. But this was certainly new.

Bill had already turned to leave, but hesitated and turned around again. He was never able to resist attention. He held his cane behind his back, mustering the human. “I've been visiting another dimension and saw a demon that fell in love with a human.” he said slowly and pointedly. A visible shiver went through the triangle, clearly one of disgust.

Dippers eyes grew round and huge. Then he laughed under his breath and pushed a hand through his hair. “Man, that's possible? Demons can love humans?”

“If they are weak and stupid then yes, it is possible.”

An itch to write this new information down went through Dipper while he processed it, and he looked around himself absently. As if a notebook would just appear in the grass. He pondered the thought for a moment, before he looked up again. “So, could you fall in love too?”

Bill flared red within a second. “Are your ears broken, human? Maybe I should cut them off for you.”

He dared to laugh out loud, seeing that Bill hat gotten the hint. “Just messing with you.” Looking around again, he rubbed the back of his neck. “I just think it's funny. In human history, love is always described as the strongest of all powers.”

Bill returned to his golden complexion. “Of course you do. It's the thing humans can do best. So you act like it's the best thing. But you are good at it because you are weak. It's that simple.”

He really wasn't surprised the demon saw it that way. “So.. did that human love the demon as well?” he said to change the subject. He could feel his cheeks grow hot when his eyes returned to Bill, part of his brain finally catching up into what kind of territory their conversation had wandered off into.

Bill didn't seem to catch it though, as he was scratching under his eye with a thoughtful look. “I think so, it looked like it. You humans do stick your tongues into things you like, right?”

Useless stutter was the only response he managed to give to that, his face flushing up to his ears. As he was trying to compose himself, Bill grabbed his cane on the other end and raised it. 

“Lesson over, kid. This is your homework til next time – You don't call me, I call you! Bye!” he shouted and slapped his face with his cane so hard that his head snapped to the side.

 

Dipper awoke with a start, and for a second he expected to be in the Mystery Shack. But he wasn't of course. He was in his flat. And he was twenty, not fifteen. He smiled a bit. He hadn't visited Gravity Falls for a few months now. It was refreshing to dream about his teenage summers, albeit he never had issues with demons back then. Monsters and mythical creatures had been enough, thank you very much.

'Did I just have a dream in which my dream self had a lucid dream? That's messed up..'

He let the dream roll through his head again, feeling too tired to write it all down. A Illuminati dream demon with a top hat. Really? He laughed quietly to himself. He had to tell Mable about this one.

He was starting to drift back to sleep as one word came to his mind. Or rather, a name.

“Bill.”

He sat up quickly. He had called the triangle in his dream Bill. A smile crossed his face as he said the name out loud again. It felt like he had already said it a thousand times.

Of course his appearance had been weird, but he had behaved just like his blonde stranger. Also his voice and his airs and graces had been all the same.

He threw his covers aside and got up quickly. He had to talk to Mabel about this right now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whenever I read Dipper Gleeful and Will Cipher fanfiction I imagine Bill being super pissed off about it.  
> Thank you for your sweet comments so far, I treasure them very much!


	3. Fire

“It's amazing, isn't it?”

Mabel was giving him a long look while she chewed her food.

The silence stretched between the two until Dipper felt his smile falling.

The room was filled with the faint sounds of silverware and soft conversations.

She just stayed silent and kept reading and Dipper just couldn't place her reaction at all.  
The dreams in his journal were screenplay material, he'd been sure that his bubbly twin would be just as delighted about them as he was. Furthermore, she was a sucker for romance and some of these dreams were really corny.

To think his excitement to share his dreams could turn into dread to quickly.

Finally, Mabel closed the notepad and looked up with a look of worry in her eyes. Dipper leaned back in his seat and made a face.

“What are giving me that look for?”

“Dipper.. Could it be that you are a bit on the lonely side.?”

It took some seconds, but suddenly Dippers cheeks felt hot.

“What? Mabel, no! That's not was these dreams are about, what are you thinking?”

He wasn't lonely. He had a few pals at school and they'd hang out every now and then. The only time he could remember feeling lonely was right after he and Mabel had moved to different campuses but that had passed two years ago.

Mabel just sighed and smiled sadly.

“Yeah but what about your romance department?”

Dipper pulled another face and looked away. He really didn't like this topic at all.

“I don't have a romance department. And there's no need to. I don't miss anything. And these dreams, they are mostly adventures! I just wanted to show you because this character always shows up and it's kind of cool, it reminded me of the supernatural cases we chased as kids!”

He crossed his arms and lowered his voice.

“In some of these dreams, that guy is a freaking triangle! How does that even link to my romantic department?”

Mabel just shrugged and raised her eyebrows. “Excuse me, I won't judge what rows your boat.”

Dipper gasped to disagree but couldn't. His face was burning by now.

“That's not the point!” he hissed and a flash of victory flashed over his sisters’ face before her eyes returned to the notepad in front of her.

“Okay, but I have one more question. Did you ever.. you know..” she stuttered and lowered her voice.

Dipper watched in confusion as Mabels face turned pink.

“Did I what? What do you mean?”

He could see that she gathered her thoughts before she leaned forwards and whispered in a hushed voice.

“There are no sex dreams in here, did you never have any or did you just not write it down?”

“What?!”

The shout rang through the small restaurant. Silverware stopped and head turned towards them and all Dipper could do was to hide his burning face in his hands.

Slowly the noise around them returned and Dipper grit his teeth and rubbed his eyes.

“No. There weren't any.” he admitted slowly. Maybe Mable would drop her theory now.

“I see. This is bad.”

Her dark tone made him look up, dreading what she would say next.

“You really carve genuine affection, not just another body beside yours! Dipper, you need to listen to your soul!”

Somewhere deep down Dipper asked himself what he had expected.

-

Later that evening after wrestling with is homework for hours, Dipper fell ungainly into his bed. He wrapped up lazily in his blankets and stared to the ceiling.

For the thousandth time this day his thoughts drifted back to the lunch date with Mabel and he pulled a face.  
  
It was just plain stupid. He wasn't lonely.  He loved his adventurous dreams and he certainly was not just dreaming up company for his poor lonely soul. He hated the thought. It made his fond memories turn into something sad. He'd never prefer the dreams to reality, he never tried sleeping earlier or longer to get them.

“Don't let it get to you, Pines.” he murmured sleepily, slowly drifting into sleep.

-

The snowstorm was howling outside the tiny cabin. The moonlight outside illuminated white dancing spots in an eerie light, but it was a matter of time before the windows would fall dark under the masses of snow.

Dipper blinked slowly. He felt so tired and it was so very warm and cozy. A fireplace was lit before him and blankets wrapped around him, there was absolutely nothing to worry about. It felt so nice, he almost slipped back into sleep. Bur something was odd. Where was he?

He raised his eyes from the fire and looked around. Was he dreaming again? For a slit second he felt like the dream was shifting away from him and he held his breath. His surroundings stilled again and he breathed out slowly.

“It's going to be over soon.”

A smooth voice was right by his ear and Dipper stopped dead in his tracks.

Ever so slightly, he turned his head.

Bill was right beside him, his eyes resting on the fire.

He almost did not dare to ask.

“What.. what's going to be over?”

The man looked into Dippers face and he almost stopped breathing. He'd never been this close.

“The power outrage. I'm sure the power will come back on soon.”

Dipper looked at his surroundings again and slowly it dawned to him. The room was dark besides some candles and the fire. There was a cup of tea in his hands, tightly wrapped between his fingers to unfreeze them. His neck felt cold and hair was sticking to the side of his face. Was it wet? And from the look of it, every blanket of the house pooled around them. And to go with it, one arm was wrapped around him, holding him close.

He looked back towards Bill from the corner of his eye.

Finally, he had a chance to really look at him.

He had a nice face.

Little droplets of cold melted snow clung to his hair, quite a few wet strands sticking to his cheeks and forehead.

His sharp eyes were a beautiful light brown color and his eyelashes were long and dark.

“Bill?”

He tried the name quietly, carefully. Those soft eyes moved to meet his and a fond smile stretched over Bills face.

Dipper could feel his heart pounding against his chest, his real chest in the real world. It made it all that harder to keep sleeping, to keep dreaming but he couldn't wake up now.

Dammit, he was in love with this guy, and he was just a dream.

His eyes started burning with shame but he couldn't stop himself. He raised a hand to touch his cheek. The cup slipped from his fingers and hit the floor and with a start, Dipper was back in his bed, back in his flat, his heart racing, his blanket almost suffocating him.

-

Mabel called the next day and told him she had read that the people in your dreams a strangers you saw once before. Dipper thanked her but kept to himself how scary the thought of some stranger with Bills face was to him.


	4. Coffee

Warm sunlight streamed through the window onto Dippers skin and he groaned, letting his head fall back and shutting his eyes. The warmth on his skin was very welcome, but it also meant that he'd spent yet another night thinking and forgetting time and sleep until the sun came up. The last few days had been a mess off classes, bars and overthinking.

Ever since he had come to terms with his stupid little crush, he had tried to figure out what to do next.  
In the end, Dipper did what always helped him.  
He made a list.

He was currently back in his flat at his desk, which needed a clean up. Small pecks of dust danced in the streaming sunlight. In front of him lay a very short list.

'1. Apparently I (also) like guys'

It was an obvious conclusion from his dreams. And if Mabel was right and his subconsciousness was telling him to look for someone, men weren't out of the question. Maybe his mind was telling him to extend his target group.  
So Dipper had tried to keep an eye open for someone that might catch his eye, but no one ever did. He included men into his search too. When he was out with friends, his eyes followed some passing guys but even if he just tried to find one he might be attracted to, he never felt anything.  
And if he was honest with himself, he did not want to meet someone. He wasn't into dating, trying to find someone sounded like a hassle. He was fine by himself.  
When he observed his group of friends he realized that he never considered anything beyond friendship with these fellas either. 

But why was he having these dreams if it wasn't his lonesomeness?

'2. I have crush on a person that does not exist'

And since Dipper had come to realize these feelings, he could not shake the nagging sensation of lovesickness.  
Usually a lot of nice feelings came with a crush, the high of being in love and owning the world. At least in Dippers imagination this feeling existed. But the fact that Bill did not exist turned his crush into a hopeless cause. And a desolate taste accompanied every stirring of fondness.

When he was in class, he suddenly felt the urge to see Bill. 

When he saw a glimpse of blonde hair, he'd try to get a better look. 

It was pointless. And Dipper was starting to get on his own nerves.

Staring down onto the glorious number of two points on his list, he gave up. He ranked his hands through his hair for the tenth time, rubbing the mark on his forehead with the heel of his hand. 

Maybe he just needed to let it go, but the dreams were an issue. He did not dare to look forward to them, but there was no point in trying to avoid them either. Maybe if he'd come to terms with the distinction of reality and dreams and trained lucid dreaming more, he'd be able to stop this whole thing.

His eyes trailed to the clock behind his desk and he groaned again. It was 8 o'clock in the morning and he hadn't slept a wink. He didn't feel tired either but he'd have to grab a coffee before he had classes around ten. A very strong coffee.

Pushing his hair back onto his forehead he rose from his chair to get ready for the day. 

-

Dipper loved many things about the coffee store down his road. The sound of the bell when he entered, the smell that hit his tired being and the silent understanding between the other customers – they had come here for the same reason. They needed peace and coffee. Mainly coffee. 

By the time he arrived he felt the lack of sleep seeping through his bones. Making his way to the counter, he heard a soft chuckle somewhere in the room. It sounded like Bill.

'Oh my god, did I really just think that? How far gone am I?'

Heaving a sigh, Dipper moved to order a strong beverage to go.  
He almost left the store without looking up. Only unconsciously, he raised his eyes to a figure with blonde locks in the corner of his eye.

The coffee slipped from his fingers and the cup made a slapping noise as it hit the floor.

On a table about ten feet away sat Bill. 

A living, breathing copy of the person he'd dreamed about for months. 

The blonde hair moved back as if a hand had just combed through them.  
The honey colored eyes snapping up from his laptop at the noise of his falling coffee, traveling up his body to meet his eyes.

Oh shit.

Dipper swallowed, his hand still raised where his strength had failed him. He had to look like a total idiot, staring at a stranger like that. But his body was frozen. Slowly, he tried to apologize, his face growing hot, eyes shooting down to the mess he'd made. 

“Pine Tree..?”

Dippers head snapped back up. The face of the stranger had turned pale and his eyes wide. He seemed just as disbelieving. 

Suddenly his body decided that flight was the best solution for this particular situation.  
“I.. I have to go!” 

Blindly grabbing the door handle and ignoring the sea of coffee he crossed, he bolted outside and cursed to himself, hurrying down the road.  
His heart was beating so hard against his rib cage that it hurt. He gasped a few times, trying to catch up with the situation and slowing down his steps.

What did he just do? Why did he run away? 

He'd never considered the possibility that Bill really existed. Not only that, he did recognize him. Dipper felt his face grow incredibly hot and covered his face with his hands, coming to a halt altogether. 

The man had used the nickname Bill always used in his dreams. His stomach twisted at the thought. Could it be that he hadn't created Bill in his mind, but rather shared his dreams with him? That was totally impossible.

“Wait!”

Dipper turned around to see the blonde man emerging from the coffee store, a jacket thrown over his arm.

Dippers heart skipped a beat and he considered running away once more, but forced himself to stay where he was. While he waited for him to catch up he had time to grasp that he looked like actual shit today. From his unkempt hair over his eyes circles down to his worn sneakers. He really wasn't dressed to meet the man of his dreams. Literally.

His counterpart on the other hand looked absolutely flawless, much to Dippers dismay. 

The man stopped in front of him and offered a friendly smile, though he looked nervous himself. 

“Who are you?” Dipper blurted out before the stranger could say a word.

The blonde blinked and a cheeky grin appeared on his face.

“The name's Bill Cipher.”

Relief flooded Dippers body, accompanied with a thousand new questions. He studied his face, uncertain what to do. Then he held out his hand.

A grin split Bills face as he took it, shaking but holding onto it. His palm was warm.

“So, may I ask what's your name?”

“Dipper Pines. ”

Bills smile grew even wider. 

“I've been dying to know it.”

A grin to match spread across Dippers face.

“No, I think that's my part most of the time.”

Bill Cipher laughed aloud and held a hand to his chest.

“Don't remind me, that was a painful way to wake up. Please refrain from dying in the future.”

Dipper just smiled and felt his whole body tingle pleasantly. Bills voice had a nice, lively tune to it.

“No promises.”

Bill smiled and raised his brows. 

“For now, will you let me buy you a new coffee?”

A surge of heat broke over Dippers face but he tried to look casual as he nodded lightly. 

“Let's go.”


	5. In the Shadows

A giddy, bubbly feeling traveled up Dippers body as he hurried down the road towards his apartment.

There was no need to hurry but he felt like running and jumping anyway. Of course he wasn't running, that would just make him look like a total maniac, paired with the bags under his eyes and the wide grin across his face. So he kept himself from running, but his feet bounced on the pavement and the smile stayed on his face the whole time.

Today he had been reckless, and he had been brave. He covered his mouth to smother his idiot grin but it wouldn't bulge.

This day had been perfect. Suddenly everything was brighter, the air felt fresher and he felt like laughing out loud.  
He was a lovesick fool and he was very aware of it. And it was amazing.

-

Earlier that day, when the morning wind was still fresh and blew around Dippers nose as he followed a certain blonde back to the coffee store, a simple thought came to him.

'Maybe I've lost my mind.'  
  
His feet faltered slightly and his eyes shoot up to the back in front of him. Bill had taken the lead. Everything about him looked real. It did not feel like a dream, it felt real. But meeting this person was about as likely as starting to hallucinate.  
  
The notion of possibly having delusions with this intensity was scary to say the least. Dipper slowed down a little and looked down onto the pavement, pondering if he should call Mabel. His stomach started to twinge and he felt his blood run cold. If he was truly making this up, he'd be a lost cause for sure.

Bill looked over his shoulder, about to say something but stopped halfway by the sight of Dippers face. He stopped walking.  
  
“Dipper? Is something wrong?”  
  
Dipper lifted his eyes of the pavement and opened his mouth, but no words to phrase his thoughts came to him. At least no words that didn't sound incredibly stupid. 'I'm pondering whether you are a delusion or not' didn't pass as acceptable small talk at this point.  
  
Bill watched him struggle for a moment, his eyebrows drawn together and looking worried. Suddenly, he straightened his back and his face straightened as well, looking at him with kind eyes nonetheless.  
  
“Dipper, listen. You don't have to come inside with me.”  
  
He turned towards Dipper fully.  
“This thing that is happening with us.. it's okay if you don't want to pursue it.”  
  
Dippers head snapped up, his ears prickling with heat. The phrasing Bill chose made his heart jump and he felt stupid for it, since he obviously was referring to the dream sharing issue. Nothing more. But he quickly raised his hands as he caught on what Bill was taking his reaction for.  
  
“No, no no! I'm really glad we met! It's just.. I was just thinking if I've gone bonkers.”  
  
Bill raised his eyebrows and the next second he laughed loudly, a cackling sound that Dipper had heard before and it eased his worries, even if it wasn't proof of his sanity it was proof that he was facing the same person from his dreams. No one else would laugh like that naturally.  
  
A playful smirk stayed on Bills face as he nodded. “Well, if you are, I am too. And you can go see a shrink after we talked just as well.”  
  
Dipper smiled a bit and shook his head as he entered the coffee store while Bill held the door open.  
What a cocky jerk.  
  
-

As they entered the store, an employee was just mopping up the leftovers of Dipper big latte with three espresso shots. Dipper hurried to her side.  
  
“Oh my god, I'm so sorry. Let me-- can I do it?”

The girl gave him a fairly annoyed look that made Dipper feel even smaller about he whole ordeal than he already did. It was just too embarrassing to even think about it. But even if she punished him with a long, disappointed look, she still shook her head no.  
“It's alright, no problem.” she said, even if everything about her screamed disapproval.

“Sorry..” Dipper said again lamely, his shoulder hunched and a hand on the back of his neck.  
  
He turned towards the table Bill had occupied earlier and was greeted with an amused look. Apparently, everything he did was highly entertaining.

“What?” Dipper asked as he sat down.

“Why don't you fall to your knees to complete the look?”

Dipper snorted but bit down a quick response along the lines of 'You would like that' and 'never in a million years' as he was still painfully aware he had just met this person, even if it didn't feel like it.

He looked around instead. Usually he just grabbed a coffee to go here, he couldn't remember ever sitting down. Bill's table was quiet in the center of the room. He turned towards Bill.  
  
“You know, my sister told me that the faces you see in your dreams are strangers you've seen before. That would fit if didn't remember the dreams as well. Wait, you do, right?”  
Bill had folded his hands under his chin as he watched Dipper ramble on. Damn, he was way too handsome. It wasn't fair.

He smirked and nodded.

“I remember seeing you in my dreams. But it's debatable how much we remember the same way.”

Dipper blushed deeply and swallowed around a brand new lump in his throat. He should show Bill his journal. It still seemed to early to share such personal details. His notes were objective but it would raise unpleasant questions if Bill didn't remember the romantic parts.  
Which was not very likely by the interest Bill showed towards him, he told himself. He was totally absorbed with meeting Dipper, he could tell. Even if he was way more laid-back about the whole thing, he still hadn't touched his coffee since they sat down and he made eye contact every time Dipper looked over. Which made not looking very hard.

“This is the most supernatural thing that had happened to my in years.” Dipper muttered.

Bill sat up a little straighter.

“You believe in the supernatural?”

Dipper decided how to react within a heartbeat. People usually lost a great chunk of faith in his intelligence when he agreed to this question. But there was no point in being ashamed. He knew it was real.

“Yes. I've experienced quite a few abnormalities in my childhood. My great uncle researched them.” he explained in a sober tone.

Bill watched him and nodded. “I guess that makes everything easier” he said thoughtfully and turned his eyes away for the first time, dedicating himself to his coffee and talking a sip.

“Easier?”

Bill looked up and raised an eyebrow.

“We don't have to discuss how 'impossible' this whole thing is” he said, his already expressive voice giving an ridiculous tune to the word 'impossible'.

Dipper laughed and nodded. His eyes darted to his backpack with his dream journal.

“For now, let's just assume we remember the same things. Maybe it's something like memories from past lives? Though they were a bit to fantastic to have been real, right?”

He raised his eyebrows and looked at Bill expectantly.

Bill smiled at that, humming for a second. “Maybe. Past lives, rebirth and linked fates? That's a bit much to assume though.”  
Dipper nodded. “Sure, but it would explain why we almost never use names really.”

Bill smiled fondly at that, his eyes not meeting Dippers. “Pine Tree.”

Dipper involuntary smiled a little too. Then he shook his head and leaned back.

“But you were a freaking triangle in some of them, I highly doubt that these truly happened.”

Bills smile cracked into something playful at that and he took another sip before he mused, in a smooth tone. “You are aware that we are lovers in most of these dreams.”

Dippers face was on fire within a second and his heart stopped. His eyes darted to Bills hands, checking if there was a wedding band on his left. He never really considered that Bill maybe wasn't available or even swinging that way. Hell he did not even consciously decide that he wanted from Bill. But he very much knew he was head over heels for this stranger. But his thoughts had never evolved beyond that point.

His heart pounded and ached and he looked up into Bills eyes, still unsure what to respond.  
The predator smirk on Bills face was all that Dipper needed to clear his worries.  
He held his gaze for a moment, inwardly cursing the way his cheeks burned. And instead of saying something, he just let a smile spread across his face before he looked away towards the counter as if he was contemplating if he should get another coffee.

 He did not miss how Bills eyes lit up.

-

The midday sun burned down onto them as the exited the store together. Dipper smiled against the blinding sun, feeling his fatigue rushing back to him.  
  
Heading to the campus was pointless now anyway. They walked towards the station quietly.  
Dipper pulled out his phone to check for messages. He got one from his friends he shared classes with. Bill was doing the same thing, staring at his phone with a light frown on his face.  
Seeing the phone in his hand, Dipper raised his own.

“Would you give me your number? So we can keep in touch?”  
  
His voice sounded almost casual in his own ears. Only a little pitch at the end.

Bill gave him an amused look and they exchanged numbers. Dipper contemplated whether checking if the number worked would be rude until his phone flashed with a call from Bill, who obviously had no such qualms. He laughed and shook his head.  
  
They stood in silence for a second. Dipper was torn inside. He couldn't just walk away from this. This whole meeting had been something special, the beginning of something. But he was well aware that it was possible that it wasn't anything. Maybe they wouldn't stay in touch no matter how eager they felt right now.  
  
He felt like this could be over like any of his dreams ended. Suddenly with no continuation.  
  
Moving closer to Bill by half a step, he put a hand on the others upper arm.  
  
Bill looked up, a warm spark gleaming in his eyes. He smiled softly, shaking his head lightly.  
  
“I'd pay a fortune to know what's going on in this head of yours right now” he said in a low voice.  
  
Dipper was helpless in his need to express what he wanted and the fear of acting like a total lunatic.  
  
“This feels like it is another dream.” he confessed under his breath.  
  
A light-hearted snort was the answer. “Are you scared to wake up?” A hand gently cupped Dippers elbow as Bill moved in closer as well.  
  
Dipper looked up.  
  
“If this was a dream..”  
  
“Yeah“  
  
Dipper held his gaze while Bill scanned his face, pondering. It was obvious that the other man was unsure if he was allowed to go further. At least Dipper was sure of it, and it made his heart pound like a caught bird in his chest.

“If this was a dream, we'd be lovers.”  
  
“About to say goodbye.”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
Dippers heart ached. He really did want to get to know the real Bill, to meet this new person. But his feelings were already put in place long before today and his longing so much stronger than his reason.  
  
“Can we pretend that we are still dreaming just for a second?”  
  
Instead of answering, Bill leaned in closer.  
  
In the cool shadows of the trees, they kissed.  
  
It was soft and sweet, their lips barely moving against the others but lingering long enough to be more, much more than a peck. They pulled away slowly.  
  
Dipper leaned his forehead against Bills, closing his eyes for a second, exhaling at ease. He heard and felt Bill laughing lightly and carefree. “Text me, will you?”  
  
He wanted to pull Bill into a hug but he didn't. Oddly enough, hugging seemed to intimate at this point, even if he had kissed this man just seconds ago. Eventually he took a step back.  
  
“I will.” he smiled and pushed his hands into his pockets sheepishly.

 


	6. Witch

As he closed the door to his apartment, Bill did not turn on the lights right away. His shaky exhale was the only sound in the quiet room.

Slowly, he leaned back against the closed front door and allowed his nerves to show.

He clenched his fists to hide the tremble of his hands and breathed a barely audible laugh into the silence of the room.

-

Dipper was staring down at his phone.

It was seated on the kitchen counter, just far enough away from the stove top to be safe and near enough for him to stare at it without burning his eggs.

He had spent hours starring at it last night, not able to find sleep with the new discoveries he'd made yesterday.

The idea that he could magically link his mind with another human being in his sleep had the annoying side effect that he was too expectant to find any. So he had stared at his phone, wondering if Bill was awake as well but not daring to check if he was online.

When he had woken up on the first streaks of sunlight, feeling like he hadn't slept a wink and without any memory of a dream, he had taken his phone and, still in high jinks, written a text.

'Shame I didn't meet you tonight – maybe it would have been different now'

His phone had buzzed shortly after with a response.

'What a waste of dream potential innit?'

Dipper was still unsure about the intonation of this message but it was casual enough to reassure him that he wasn't being too bothersome.

But now that he was up and about and his stomach demanded food, as lack of sleep and disappearing excitement dragged his mood on a adequate level, he stared down at his phone with another thought in his head.

He should call Mabel.

He had told her everything about the dreams up to this point. And she was his reinsurance whether he had gone and lost his mind or not. No matter how real everything felt, insanity was never out of the question for him.

Dipper looked down at his eggs and took a moment to reminisce about his sister. The person he wanted to be the judge to his sanity. Who was the most detached from reality as a healthy person could be.

He sighed and stirred, unsure what to do. He didn't know how to explain. Maybe if he somehow got a picture of Bill, he could show it to her. So with a growling queasiness in his stomach that totally stemmed from his hunger he postponed talking to his twin for another day.

-

Later that day, after a long shower and several classes, Dipper was sitting with his classmates in a crowded place, eating sandwiches for lunch. He slowly started to feel like a human again and smiled down at his phone. Apparently Bill was on his lunch break as well because he had been sending texts for a few minutes straight.

'If you are free around six we could grab dinner together'

'That's right, take me out to dinner first will you Pine Tree'

'the hell is it with you Cipher, I'm not treating you. I'm a poor student'

“Did your crush finally have mercy on you, Pines?”

Dipper raised his head in surprise and found all of his five friends smirking at him. He rushed to shut off his phone screen but he felt his cheeks grow hot already.

“I don't have a crush, I just met someone.”

“Yeah right. Running around like a wet blanket for weeks and now you look like baby Jesus with a Popsicle.” Nate, who was sitting on his right, nudged his side. Will on the other side of the table snorted.

Dipper knew his mates had the best intentions but it was hard to swallow down an insult.

“I only met him yesterday, I barely know him, it's nothing.”

There was a bit of a silence after that so Dipper raised his gaze off the tabletop. He was greeted by round eyes.

Bruno, who was sitting opposite him beside Will, was the first to speak again. “Man, you never told us you were into guys!”

Dipper blinked just like his friends, shocked how he didn't consider being more careful. He looked around. His friends were nice folks, he'd never questioned them being ok with it. He raised his hands.

“No.. yes.. I mean.. Is it a problem?”

He bit his tongue as soon as the question left his mouth because it implied that they were right about his crush. But his friends were fairly distracted by the turn of events by now anyway. Heads started shaking and Dipper was relieved that no one seemed to mind at all.

Bruno gave a hearty laugh. “Oh man, that was the smoothest coming out I've ever seen!”

All of the others tuned in on the laugh and Dipper was roughly slapped on the back. He was still kind of shocked and not quite realizing what just happened.

“What about the mysterious male crush then?” Nate started asking again and Dipper stared him down.

“I'm not telling you, get lost!”

 

-

Waiting outside the office building for Bill to turn up was more nerve wrecking than Dipper had anticipated. Casual texting and supportive friends had changed nothing about his nerves. Part of him was still relentlessly reminding him that they met only yesterday, it was annoying.

He felt like he knew Bill for a while now, but he willed himself to wait and get to know the real Bill. The kiss shouldn't have happened.

When Bill strolled out of the building and waved goodbye to his coworkers, Dipper was reminded how run down his things were in comparison to them. He never cared much and he tried not to care right now either.

“Hey Pine Tree, shall we go? Where is this place you wanted to go?”

Bill greeted him with the same friendly smile as the day before. Dipper could see two of his colleges crane their necks after him over Bills shoulder. He grabbed the strap of his bag a little tighter.

“It's down the road. This way.”

He turned around and started walking. It seemed like a rude greeting to him but Bill just joined his side without a care in the world.

“Will I keep that nickname now? Pine Tree?”

“You haven't told me your real name yet, have you?”

Dipper looked over to him, surprised. Bill raised his eyebrows.

“Who on earth is actually named Dipper? That can't be your real name right?”

Most people just accepted the odd name by now. He had had several problems in school with official papers featuring his nick name instead of his real name.

“You are right, it isn't” he admitted a bit reluctant. “But that's super rude of you. What if it was my real name?”

“Then I'd proceed to call you Pine Tree anyway. I like it. On the topic, do you really possess this hat with the pine tree on the front?”

“Oh, that one.” Dipper blinked a few times. “Yes, when I was smaller. But I traded it with a friend when I was twelve. No, thirteen.” He smiled a bit. “I wore that traded hat almost constantly when I was a teenager. It's weird that I was wearing the old hat so much in my dreams.”

Bill fell silent. He seemed a little bothered but not enough to voice anything. Dipper wondered what was wrong but Bills expression suddenly changed when they passed a newspaper stand. He may looked like a sulking child for a second but suddenly he looked like they were passing a toy store.

Dipper couldn't help but smile. “Do you want to get something here?”  
  
Bill looked at him like he was caught and stopped walking. “If you don't mind? We don't have to.”

Dipper shook his head and stopped as well. “Go on, I'll wait.”

Bills face lit up instantly. “It will only take a second!” He walked up to the stand and pulled out a colorful magazine with practiced purposefulness. For the horror of one second Dipper wondered if it was a porn magazine, but as Bill went to pay he got a better look of the remaining stack.  
It was titled “Illuminati monthly” and had the wildest phrases plastered over the cover.

Dipper muttered 'What the actual fuck' under his breath and he raised his eyebrows. Well, still better than porn.

When Bill returned to his side and they resumed walking, he turned his head to look at Bill.

“Why don't you just get a subscription if you know what you want?”  
  
Bill just rolled his eyes and huffed. “Yeah right. I will not give them my name, address and credit card information all at once.”

Dipper dug his hands into the jeans of his pockets and laughed. “Don't you think they have all of that anyway?”

A smirk played around Bills mouth as he glanced over to him.

“Of course they do.”

Dipper stopped as they reached the place he had picked out for dinner and Bill moved to open the door for him. Dipper snorted at the gesture but walked in anyway, giving him a mock bow with his head.

“But that's not a reason to play into their hands, is it?” Bill concluded as he followed Dipper inside and closed the door behind him.

 -

Dipper finished tying his second boot and groaned a little. Putting on his battle armor was such a hassle. It wasn't even heavy, just the amount of cords and fasteners was too much and to complicated. They weren't designed to be put on without help, but he had to cope; his companion wasn't going to help him.

His demon stood by the window, his back facing Dipper. His blonde hair was still looking wild from sleeping but he was fully dressed in a battle coat that was way more complicated than Dippers. The demon never lifted a finger to get dressed, he had his magic do it for him. Something that Dipper simply refused to practice. It was a waste of time he could use to learn more powerful magic.

When he was ready he sat up straight and smiled to himself. Today was an important day. A witch hunter had been following them for the last months and it wasn't just anyone – it was the head of the hunters, the one that hat killed most of Dippers kind. And he had walked right into their trap.

One of Dippers latch spells had activated this morning. Within the next few hours, the hunter would face them and the advantages would be on their side.

“Did I tell you that I can see the day that you are going to die?”

Dipper breathed a laugh, full of good spirits.

“Yes, about a hundred times. Even the evening we met. Not really the best pick up line but go ahead and gloat about how it worked anyway. I don't care.”

Dippers heart fluttered in anticipation. He knew his partner would just use his strange ways to encourage him. He'd tell Dipper how this day wasn't his dying day so he'd walk into the battle with all he got.

“It's today.”

The demon turned halfway towards him and the light from the outside refracted in his eyes, letting them glow like yellow bottle glass catching a sunray.

Dippers heart stopped, but continued pounding twice as hard.

“What..? Today?” he got up and stepped forward. The demon looked at him with a blank face before his eyes softened and he smiled in his wicked way. It was affectionate, but very much inappropriate.

“I figured I should tell you so we can say goodbye properly.”

For a second, Dipper felt like he was going to faint. But a weird sobriety came over him as well. He let go of the breath he was holding and walked over to him.

He let his head fall against Bills shoulder without even thinking about it. Arms wrapped around him and held him tight, which was rare. Dipper shivered and savored it for a moment, before he leaned back and looked up.

“You had to tell me this after I got fully dressed?” His voice was betraying his nagging pretty much, but Bill threaded a hand through his hair and smiled anyway.  
  
“I held you yesterday without grief weighting down your stupid human heart, and you don't need the enemy finding you more vulnerable than your brittle meat sack body already is.”

Dipper pulled a face and clenched his fists.

“What does it matter if I'm going to bite the grass anyway?”

The hand in his hair tightened and Dipper stilled.

“I said you'd die, I can't say if you win or lose.”

A noise left Dippers throat and he pressed forward, catching Bills lips with his own. The demon returned the kiss, sliding his hands over his body and his tongue over his lips.

There was a passion that wasn't meant for demons to hold, and not for humans to share. As they broke apart and hugged again, their unheard of friendship and love was something neither of them could deny and something neither of them would utter.

-

Dipper did not bother to bring more than his battle supplies as they made their way towards the hillside they had prepared.  
A cluster of rocks provided a blind spot at the higher end of the area. Settling behind them, they waited. It wasn't long until Dipper could sense a disturbing high concentration of power coming towards them. He raised his eyes to meet Bill, alarmed, but his demon didn't seem surprised at all. He gave him a short nod and Dipper tried to concentrate. He had to fight this monster with everything he had.

“I'm sorry Pine Tree. I lied to you. But that's what demons do.”

Dipper ripped his eyes open and stared in horror as Bills hand closed around his throat and his companion pressed him against the rough rocks.

With a blue flame lit around his finger, he traced Dippers lips, silencing his voice. Tracing his finger over Dippers wrists with calm measure, he sealed them against the stone. Then he let go of his throat.

Dipper tried to scream in anger but not the slightest wheeze sound left his throat, no matter how much air passed his lips. Bill smiled at him, amused.

“Forgive me, I couldn't help but force a goodbye. It's not you who is going to die today. It's me. ”

Dipper stopped trashing and just stared at his lover, heaving soundless gasps. 

“That's much better. There isn't much time.”

Bill stepped closer to him and pushed the bangs away from Dippers forehead.

“I knew you were no match for him. Even if you are probably the most promising witch there is right now. You can't beat him. But he'll go down with me.”

Dipper looked down as Bill placed a gentle kiss against his birthmark.

“You better become the scariest witch of them all.”

Stricken with grief, Dipper looked up to him, but closed his eyes as tears started to stream down his face. He hated Bill for taking his voice. He hated himself for not saying what needed to be said while he still had the chance to.

Bill leaned down to press a chaste kiss to his lips before he turned and walked away into the open, out of Dippers sight.

Dipper wept soundlessly and leaned back against the rock.

All he could see was the forest in front of him. He could barely hear the fight until a blaze of released demonic power exploded around him. The rocks sheltered him and as the blaze died down, so did the seals against his wrists. And as Dipper fell to the ground and started to hear his own sobs, there was not a grain of dust left of his lover.

 -

Dipper woke up with a start. His heart was pounding in his chest and the pillow against his cheek was wet with tears.

Allowing himself to take a few breaths, he shuddered and tried to calm down. The dreams had never affected him that much. They had never been this long either.

His heart hurt just from thinking about the dream. He blindly started groping for his phone and opened his messenger. It was half past four in the morning.

Bill was online.

Dipper tried to calm himself as he typed.

'Are you awake?'

'Yes'  
  
Dipper stared at his phone. Bill stayed online but he did not write either.

As new tears slipped over Dippers face and he cursed them, he started typing again.

'Can you come over?'  
  
Bills status flashed 'writing...' immediately.

'I'm coming.'

-

It took half an hour for Bill to arrive, which was fair enough since he had to get dressed unlike Dipper who stayed in his Shirt and Boxers as he waited and did his best not to start chewing on his shirt.

As a timid knock sounded from the door, Dipper all but rushed to open it.  
  
Bill looked pale and tired and just like Dipper felt.

“Come on in..”

He moved to take a step back but Bills hand closed around his elbow and pulled him into a hug. Dipper took in a sharp breath as he moved in and wrapped his arms around Bills neck. Arms circled his waist and drew him in. Bills face was warm against his neck as he buried himself against Dippers shoulder and it was everything Dipper needed in that moment.

They stayed like this for long minutes.

Dipper started to feel the cold air from the outside brush against his bare legs and remembered where they were. Slowly he took a step back and ushered Bill inside to close the door.

“Please sit down, do you want to drink something?”

Bill took a seat on the small couch and smiled weakly.

“Water, please.”

Dipper returned with two glasses of water and sat down beside Bill. He just didn't know what to say about the dream. He was so tired and worn out, but grateful that he could see Bill alive and well. He couldn't decide whether should take hand or not, but he stopped his musings and looked up when Bill started talking.

“When I was a small kid, I had really weird dreams. My parents send me to a doctor but it just wouldn't add up.”

He took a sip of his water. Dipper fell silent.

“I dreamed about failing grades in high school when I was only in elementary school with perfect grades and other weird stuff no one could interpret.”

Bills voice had turned low and sober.

“Once in a while I dreamed about a kid in my class. One day I asked him if he'd dreamed what I could remember and he could. I caused a huge chaos and I had to switch schools.”

Dipper sat up straighter as he listened. Bill turned to look at him.

“Everyone told me to stop talking about it. Even my brother, even though be believed me.” Bill pulled a face and turned his gaze downwards. “So I stopped talking about it but the dreams kept coming. Never my own, always the dreams of other people. The only thing I can tell that it's always from people that live near me, maybe pass me on the streets. When I first saw you one of your dreams.. ”

“You knew.”

Bill came to a halt and raised his eyes towards Dipper.

“You knew. _This whole time_.”

Dipper was shaking with anger. Water swashed onto the table as he set his glass down way to forcefully.

He was up to his feet and walked up and down in front of Bill. His thoughts were full of pure anger, fueled with humiliation.

“You knew I was somewhere, seeing these things as well. You didn't tell me any of this to lead me on.” He turned towards Bill and pointed a finger at him. “You kissed me! Had me believing some kind of fate-shit was happening to us.”

As he vented, the look on Bills face changed. 

Dipper had never seen anything but affection in this face. The gentle look had flattered his face, but the sneer that appeared now fitted him just as perfectly.  
His sharp eyes, perfect to wrinkle up warmly as he smiled, narrowed down to dismissive slits. His wide mouth that stretched into a soft smile so easily also curled into a look of subtle distaste like it was meant to be that way. 

  
Only when Bill looked at him with a glare of utter disappointment Dipper realized that this was probably the face that Bill Cipher showed to the world on a daily basis and he had taken his fond looks for granted.

Panic mixed with his rage but it was too late to turn back.

“Get out!” he said sternly and pointed to the door.

Bill remained seated and stared him down for seconds that felt endless until he stood up. He straightened his coat and turned to leave.

Dipper breathed hard until Bill was out of his flat and he closed the door.

 

 


	7. Water and Warmth

Dipper sat in the quiet of his old room at his parents house and watched the dust particles drift through the air.

He still had a dustcloth his mother shoved in his hand, clasped between his fingers, and one strap of his backpack lingered on his shoulder, ready to fall down if he moved.

Dipper knew he looked drawn but his parents’ hadn't made much of a comment. They had a tad of worry in their faces but thankfully they didn't just interrogate him on arrival.

They were going to have a family weekend with both Dipper and Mabel coming home for a overnight stay. Dipper was glad to escape his apartment. It had been two days since he'd sent Bill away and he hadn't heard from him since. He hadn't dreamed about him either. Not that he had slept very much.

He narrowed his eyes and breathed out sharply. Maybe Bill was able to control the dreams. Dipper tried to bite down the feeling of disappointment at that. There was no need for biased theories right now. He wasn't going to find out if they were true or not anytime soon.

Reality had Dipper back and he did not like it. He had spent days running after a total stranger that had manipulated him. He had felt in love for a total stranger. A twinge of that feeling made Dipper grimace, but he dismissed it as embarrassment for the whole situation.

He also still felt dread about the last dream he'd had about witches and demons.

Death had always occurred in his dreams from time to time, but always in a dreamy Shakespeare kind of way. But the last dream had ended at such a dark conclusion that it left a bitter taste behind. But Dipper was grateful for that. It made it easier to block out how much he had liked the dreams.

He was going to tell Mabel about everything today. He couldn’t really think of the words he should use so he just waited for her to arrive. With a heavy sigh he chucked his backpack off the bed and dropped backwards onto the mattress. His eyelids were heavy and the world around him started to fade already. It was the middle of the day. Surely Bill wasn't sleeping right now. He could risk a little nap.

-

He was wading through the crystal clear water. It was sloshing around his shins and he was careful not to slip on the stones under his feet nor to step on something sharp. His eyes scanned the water for the item he was searching for.

“Are you sure it is here?”

The bright glowing triangle that was floating beside him answered.

“I know it is here.”

Dipper rolled his eyes before his eyes resumed to scan the ground.

“Can't you just show me where exactly?”

“Whatever would be the fun in that?!”

Dipper groaned and straightened his back, taking a break. He rubbed his backbone to sooth it.

He was in the middle of a huge lake surrounded by a dark forest. The wind made a soft sound as it moved the branches. The same wind rustled his hair that escaped his hat. He smiled a little. It had been years since he had visited Gravity Falls.

“And you are sure that this thing will help Mabel?”

There was no reply. He turned to look to the tiny demon. His noodely arms where dangling from his body like usual but he looked confused.

As he questioned whatever was wrong, a rush of realization came over Dipper. He was dreaming. This was another dream.

“Bill! What are you doing!?” he shouted angrily, clenching his fists. The triangle looked at him, his slit pupil narrow in his wide eye, before he disappeared with a flash of light.

Dipper blinked against the blinding light and found his world suddenly tilted. He was laying on his bed, but instead of the ceiling he saw the smug face of his twin sister.

“Was exactly was Bill doing, dear brother of mine?”

-

Mabel stared at the picture on Dippers phone. She seemed to be frozen, the doubt of the last minutes wiped from her face.

It was a selfie he and Bill took at their date. Bills cheek was pressed to Dippers and they were both smiling like idiots. Dipper felt slightly sick at the mere sight.

Mabels cheeks were a little flushed when she spoke again.

“Damn Dipper, he's super cute. And he's your stalker?”

Dipper tried to draw his Phone back but Mabel snatched it from him with light speed.

“Mabel! Being attractive doesn't make him less of a dickhead!”

Mabel clearly didn't listen to him because she was grinning now.

“I guess I could say.. you were _pining_ for him?”

She cracked up at her own joke and Dippers cheeks flared up in embarrassment. She wasn't taking him serious at all!

“Mabel! He tricked me! He knew about his dream ability and he didn't tell me. He used it to gain my trust!”

Mabel calmed down a bit but she still wasn't showing the graveness that Dipper felt over the whole situation. It was starting to make him mad.

“Okay okay. So he did not tell you right away.” Her face sobered up a bit. “And.. he did take advantage of it? Did he do anything?”

Dippers anger was blown out in a second and he felt himself growing hot.

“Well.. he kissed me! Right when we met the first time.”

Mabel nodded slowly. “And if he had told you right away about his abilities, you wouldn't have wanted that?”

Dipper was quick to open his mouth to answer but nothing came out. After a second he did speak, his voice a little coarse. “I don't know.”

“Listen Dipper.. when we met you were totally ecstatic about this whole phenomenon. You always are when something extraordinary catches your interest. Maybe he didn't want to stop your enthusiasm about him.”

Her face softened a bit as she looked at the phone again.

“Yes, your story sounded a little scary. But look at this face.”

She turned the phone for him to see and tabbed the screen. True to its iPhone-self, the screen came to life for a split second. He could see how Bills eyes wrinkled up as they both let out the laughter they had been holding in.

Dipper felt betrayed but he couldn't object. He took his phone back and looked at the picture.

It was just too much. The Bill of his dreams, the Bill he'd been exited to meet and the Bill that had lied to him. All of these were the same person. A shiver ran down his spine as he remembered how cool Bills eyes had been at their last meeting. Seeing the affectionate eyes he got used to so quickly made his thoughts tumble across each other.

“You don't have to figure it out right away. Maybe you are right and he is an asshole and he tricked you.”

Dipper nodded and put away his phone before he looked up and smiled weakly.

“Thanks sis.” he said quietly.

-

It was warm. So lusciously warm that he felt almost like slipping away into sleep again.

His breath hitched lightly on the feeling of warm, smooth skin sliding against his. Dipper couldn't tell where he was but it was warm and it felt nice. Really nice.

He gave a content sigh and left his eyes closed. Hands roamed up his body slowly, cautious, leaving heat behind wherever they touched. Legs brushing his, hair tickling his chest.

Heat was pooling in his middle just from reveling in the touch. The hands stopped roaming at his hips, thumbs rubbing gentle cycles into his hip. He exhaled sharply as he felt small kisses and nibs placed on his chest and traveling up his collarbone towards his neck. The touches felt so warm and delicate and Dipper felt a spark run over him whenever the other stayed to suck on his skin.

He reached down to run his hands over lean shoulders, felt the shoulder blades move under his fingers. The other moved to his neck and Dipper bend his head to the side to give him space, his fingers curling into the hair at the nape of the man's neck.

Dipper wanted to pull him closer, as close as possible, to get to feel his skin press against him even more but he was mesmerized by the man's kisses and stayed still so he wouldn't stop.

A unexpected moan left his mouth as those lips gave a sharp tug almost behind his ear and he froze.

The man above him did too. Then, with a jumpy movement, he pulled back from Dippers neck.

Dipper opened his eyes and for a moment he looked into Bill Ciphers eyes, filled with horror just like he felt it.

Dipper gasped and suddenly the world was dark and too hot. It took several moments before he realized that he was awake and alone at his flat.

He trashed the overheated covers off his body and sat up quickly. His mind was racing.

“Oh my god..” he whispered onto his silent apartment and bit down a moan. His erection was going wild and he scratched his thighs to calm himself down. He had to think about this but his mind was still clinging to the dream. To blond tousled hair and flushed skin.

Embarrassment flooded Dipper and he put his head in his hands.

But it wasn't because of the lewd dream. It was burning his insides because he had enjoyed it but that wasn't all of it.

This dream hadn't been just sex. It had been what Dipper would consider 'making love'. It had been so affectionate.

His eyes burned as well as his guts and he laughed quietly to himself, choking on it as his throat closed up.

After all the resentment that he had felt towards Bill since they had parted, he should feel disgusted with the memory of this dream. Hurt, or taken advantage of.

But he just wished Bill would be here with him.

Have him laugh about how silly it was. Maybe carry on where he had left of.

Dipper rubbed the heel of his hand over his eyes to get the wetness of his face and raised his head, staring into the darkness.

'I'm a moron for getting all mushy over a wet dream..' the thought to himself, finally calm.

Bill had looked horrified. Maybe he wasn't controlling the dreams after all.

He settled back into the bed. His hand went down to cup himself through his boxers and he bit his lips as he allowed himself to think about honey eyes behind long lashed.

Maybe Dipper could still fix this.


	8. Benches and beds

One week.

One week had passed without a single dream.

Dippers eyes followed the professors’ hand as the man wrote on the blackboard but he didn’t follow the lecture at all.

He breathed a little sigh. From the corner of his eye he could see Will give him a look but he pointy ignored it. He knew he was worrying his friends with his gloomy mood but he did his best to play it low.

A little sigh here and there should be allowed.

One week since Dipper had decided to talk to Bill and one week of doing the opposite.

He had wanted to go, but quite suddenly classes were showing their neglect, his friends’ birthday came and went and anyway, he didn’t even have Bills address.

Much to his own embarrassment, he was stalling.

To add to his list, he had entertained the thought that maybe his lack of action showed how little he deserved the other.

Of course he couldn’t fool himself, it was just another excuse he had made up. And Mabel hat told him that being afraid was a good sign, not a bad one.

This time, he did not keep anything from his twin. Not that Mabel was giving him much space on the matter, but he wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice. He should have told her about Bill from the start.

Dipper looked up as Will stood beside him. Only then did he realize that the class was over. He made a face and got up, following Will outside.

For a small part he had hoped to share another dream with Bill before he would contact him. After all, the last one wasn’t a very good start to make it up with him. He didn’t want Bill to think that he was changing his mind over a sex dream. Even just thinking about is made Dipper ears burn a little. Maybe Bill would think that he only wanted something physical. It looked shallow at his own eyes. If Bill called him out on it, he wouldn’t know what to say. ‘Your naked body pressed against mine made me realize I have true feelings for you’ wasn’t going to work.

But no dream came and as time passed Dipper was growing worried.

Why did it stop?

-

Dipper stared at the office building behind the gates and tried to look as casual as possible. He breathed in and out slowly. A feeble attempt to slow his heartbeat down.

He had cut classes early to show up at Bills workplace.

The dread he was feeling now was so much worse than the giddy nervousness he had felt days before waiting in the same spot. Dipper snorted lightly to himself. To lie in wait for somebody made him feel like a stalker. He could’ve just tried to call or text Bill. But that just did not feel right.

He did not want to come across halfhearted.

But he still wasn’t even sure what he wanted to say.

He watched the door where he expected the idiot in question to appear. The tension within him grew with every unfamiliar person that emerged.

In the end, he didn't come at all.

Bills colleagues from the other day showed up and Dippers heart started pounding like crazy again as he braced himself for Bill appearing as well, but the door closed and only the two familiar figures moved down the path.

He let go of the breath he was holding. This was already too stressful and so far, literally nothing had happened.

Bills colleagues noticed him and the taller one walked over to him slowly. A look of mind interest was showing behind his glasses and Dipper straightened his back.

“Hello again, can I help you?”

“Uhm, Hello! Sorry, but is Bill still inside?”

An odd smile appeared on the man’s face and he shook his head. “He did not come today, he called in sick. Sorry.”

Worry bloomed in his chest. He tried to push down the disappointment and little traitorous relief that their encounter was postponed.

“Thank you for telling me.”

The man smiled at him. “He was really irritating for some days now. Can you give him something from me?”

The man pulled an envelope from his briefcase.

Dipper was about to admit that he did not know where Bill lived until he spotted the address on the envelope. He blinked in surprise and looked up. The man just smiled and Dipper took the envelope with the best poker face the could bring up.

-

The sun stood low when Dipper arrived at the address on the envelope. He squinted against the sun and turned his head to look down the road. It was a nice spot. Trees were lined beside the road and a playground was in sight. The apartment building looked a lot nicer than his place.

His nervousness had morphed into a steady tummyache but it had worn out. He wasn’t as uneasy as before. Sure, the tension nibbled on his nerves, but he was past the point of turning back. He was going to resolve this now.

After a few more seconds he pressed his thumb onto the doorbell name plate that said ‘Cipher’.

Nothing happened.

He tried again, waited even longer and rang a third time, growing unnerved.

If he called in sick Dipper had been sure he would be at home. Or maybe he wasn’t opening on purpose?

Dipper felt like kicking the door, but he held himself back. Getting angry at him after being so rude at their last encounter was also a bit bigheaded. But dammit, he had skipped classes for this.

He lightly kicked the doorstep instead.

His hand fumbled for his phone in his pocket but he did not take it out.

Writing a text would be so much easier, both mentally and by effort. But a text could be misunderstood so easily and a reply could also be more calculated than he needed right now. He wanted to talk to Bill.

A tad resigned, he turned around and looked down the road. Maybe he could suggest a place to meet via text.

His eyes stopped roaming as they caught sight of a blonde mop of hair. On a bench next to the playground sat a person, slouched down with several scarfs wrapped around his neck up to his ears. Unsure if it really was Bill, Dipper hesitated before he looked both ways to cross the road.

As he slowly approached he recognized Bill fully. The man wasn’t dressed as smart as usual. He was wearing a jacket and jeans with worn out sneakers.

He didn’t seem to notice Dipper and as he got closer it became obvious why he didn’t – he looked half asleep.

His eyes looked heavy and were underlined with dark circles. While Dipper observed him, his eyes fell closed, only to snap open again. Dipper swallowed and his heart felt like a thousand bricks. Bill was trying to avoid sleep.

Dipper made a pained face before he took a breath and walked over.

“Bill?”

Bills jumped a little and his head snapped towards him. He looked confused for a second before a snide look showed on his face.

“Pine.. Pines. What do you want? What the hell are you doing here?”

His voice sounded wonky, but he looked pleased with himself. Clearly his weariness was affecting his point of view. Dipper stumbled into a quarrel before he could stop himself.

“Well, I could ask you the same!”

A look of bold anger passed Bills face.

“Don't act like you don't know Dipshit”

Dipper shook his head in disbelieve.

“Oh my god, Bill, you need rest, you can't stay awake forever!”

“Watch me.”

“A human dies after 10 days without sleep, but you faint way before that anyway. Probably on a sidewalk since you apparently want to be robbed in broad daylight.”

Bills face colored with bright red blotched on his pale face.

“Don't act all smart with your Emergency Room shit. I am wide awake and maybe I am not human.”

Dipper drew a breath.

“I never said you were not human”

“I never said you said it. I said it.”

Dipper rubbed his eyes. It made him so angry to see him like this. Almost immediately, cold regret washed over him for thinking this way. Bill was trying to stop the dreams because Dipper had forced him with his harsh rejection. It was stupid of him, but it was his fault.

Bill didn’t seem to mind his delayed reaction, he just sighed and blinked to stay awake.

“Come on, stand up.” He took a step forward and offered a hand. “You really need to get some sleep.”

Bills looked onto his hand with displeased confusion. His mouth opened and closed, clearly not prepared to argue more. Did he think being a little difficult would drive Dipper away that easily?

He looked up in defiance. “No thanks, Mom.”

Dipper rolled his eyes and he reached down and grabbed Bills arm to yank him upright.

“Stop this already. You can’t keep this up. Let’s just go upstairs. I will stay awake.”

Bill reeled a little and gripped onto Dipper, only to let go of his shoulder like it was boiling hot as soon as he caught himself. He looked at him with open confusion, his eyebrows drawn close together. He looked so much younger right now. Dipper felt sorry for taking so long to come to him.

“I’m sorry! Ok?”

He said it angrily and it sounded like an insult. It wasn’t what Dipper had planned at all but he couldn’t bring himself to say it gently.

‘For being late. For being an asshat.’ Dipper would formulate it in more depth when Bill wasn’t swaying from exhaustion.

The confusion on Bills face was only growing but his resistance was falling. Dipper avoided his eyes, grabbed his lower arm and turned around, walking back to Bills doorstep and making sure the other followed and wasn’t run over.

Two stories up, Bill fumbled with his keys. After a while Dipper took them out of his hands gently and opened the door. Bill looked like he wanted to say something but didn’t. The surrender had him looking even more tired. His will to talk back had died down as well. Dippers anger was vanishing with it.

The fact that Bill wasn’t complaining worried Dipper more than anything else.

He tried not to look around too much in Bills flat despite his curiosity. He was an intruder after all.

“Where is the bedroom?” he asked quietly and allowed himself to open Bills jacket for him.

Bills eyes darted to a door to the right and Dipper nodded. When he tried to push the jacket off Bills shoulders, the other stopped him by grabbing onto the lapels of Dippers jacket.

Dipper stopped and mustered Bill. His mouth was a tight line, his eyes downcast. He was struggling to say something.

“It’s alright. Let’s just talk later.”

Dipper talked softly and Bills eyes met his, blinking in unyielding confusion.

The urge to kiss him was strong but Dipper kept the distance. He wasn’t going to spark another misunderstanding.

He gently pushed at Bills jacket again and smiled slightly.

“Just sleeping, nothing else. Just let me be nice to you. It’s not that hard.”

Bill hesitated again. This conversation would go much differently if Bill hadn’t been on the verge of passing out. Slowly, he let go and let Dipper strip the Jacket and his scarfs of him.

It took some more minutes until Bills shoes were dropped beside the bed and Dipper had picked up a book from Bills nightstand. Bill had wrapped himself in his blanket up to his chin.

Dipper wondered what had been Bills initial plan if Dipper hadn’t turned up. It seemed so careless of him. He settled beside him, his back against the headboard.

Bills eyes were still open and he looked troubled.

Dipper reached out and gingerly touched his hair.

“Sleep now, I’ll stay awake and we talk when you wake up.”

Amber eyes looked up to him and his hand stilled.

“Now close your eyes already.”

He opened the book and started reading. When he finished the first page, he looked down again. Bills eyes were closed now. His mouth slightly open, he breathed softly. Dipper finally allowed himself to calm down. They had not actually made up yet, but this seemed like a good starting point.

-

It was dark outside when Dipper set down the book and yawned. The clock on his phone told him it was almost midnight. He had switched on the bedside lamp at nightfall while Bill had slept like a rock.

When he looked down to Bill he almost jumped. Bills eyes were open and staring up to him.

He looked more composed now, but the shadows under his eyes were even darker.

With a lump forming in his throat, Dipper skidded farther down to lie down facing Bill. He pulled a Pillow closer to prop his head up.

“Good morning.”

Bill snorted slightly and his eyes darted to the windows.

“It’s almost midnight.” Dipper answered the unspoken question. Bills mouth formed a tight line.

Dipper sighed a little and tried to pull myself together, even if Bill refused to talk to him.

“I was a jerk and I’m sorry. I’ll listen now.”

Bills eyes darted back to his. Dippers cheeks started to feel warm but he carried on.

“What did you want to tell me when I kicked you out? I’ll listen now.”

A displeased frown pulled on the corner of Bills mouth but he didn’t comment on this. Instead, he closed his eyes.

“I wanted to tell you everything.” Bills voice was raw with sleep and he cleared his throat, blinking his eyes open. On Dippers expectant look he narrowed his eyes mockingly.

“Do you really think I’ll tell you now?”

I was still weird to see Bill defiant like this. But Dipper could feel that this was a little bit closer to Bills true self. Weirdly enough it sparked affection in Dippers heart and he snorted a little himself.

Bill looked offended but a glimmer of amusement showed in his eyes as well. Dipper almost felt like crying when he saw it. He raised a hand to his face and hid his eyes for a moment. His feelings were all over the place.

Bills Hand was warm when he touched his wrist to pull his hand away from his face.

Dipper blinked and a tiny tired smile showed on the others face.

“You shouldn’t have kept it from me.”

His voice was small but he had to start somewhere.

“It would have driven you away.”

He sounded very sure of it. Dipper sighed impatiently.

“But then I would have known it was you. I was trying so hard to push my feelings from my dreams away because I thought maybe you were a different person.”

“But I wanted it to be real, too.”

They stared at each other for a moment. Dipper swallowed.

“How.. how real are the dreams to you?”

Bill raised his eyebrows.

“What do you mean?”

“Do they count to you? Did you think you’d like my real self as well? Did you like me before we met?”

The words tumbled from his mouth, the questions he couldn’t grasp before.

Bill looked like he’d consider what he should answer for a long time.

“I’ve told you, I’ve seen peoples dreams my whole life. I don’t think I’ve ever dreamed myself.” He looked away. “When I first experienced one of your dreams they were different. Not so dull, not insane like others. I liked watching them.”

He locked eyes with Dipper again who could not tear his eyes away.

“I've been in your dreams without you noticing before. I don't know how, but I just kept coming back. And after some time, you started to dream about me.”

Bill laughed under his breath. He looked like the picture of someone retrieving a treasured memory.

“The dream about the pirates.”

It was Dipper who spoke it out aloud. Back then, it had only been a really intriguing dream. He remembered it clearly. It took several more of these dreams before he started questioning them.

“That was pretty intense...”

“Yes. That was the first one,” Bill mused. “But you did not just dream about me. It felt like it was half of my dream as well. I had never dreamed myself. If felt amazing.”

Bills smile fell away and his voice grew quiet.

“You see, I fell in love with your dreams when they were just dreams to you.”

Dipper had to think of his love sick self before he had met Bill in person. His heart did a little jump.

“Maybe you wouldn’t like me in person.”

Bill seemed to think about that for a second.

“I already liked your mind. Isn’t that the most important part?”

Dipper stared at him, and his heart raced. He couldn't think of anything to say. Unsure what to do, he moved closer to kiss him.

A hand came up between them, touching his lips and keeping them apart, and a devilish smile appeared on Bills face.

“Not so fast kid. You need to tell me your side of the story first.”

Dipper face caught fire. He opened his mouth but only managed to look even more horrified that way.

“I.. I was angry,” he started slowly, “I thought you wanted to use my feelings for you from the dreams to lead me on. That’s reasonable isn’t it?”

Bill looked tired again but he just sighed. “People never react well to it, ever.”

Dipper felt guilty at that, but he had already apologized and he didn’t want to pity Bill too much.

“I did believe you though.”

Bill smiled a little at that.

“That’s true. Most don’t believe me or they act like they do because they think I'm sick. Even my brother, who believed me at first, asked me to stop talking about it. To stay out of trouble.”

Dipper reached for Bills hand between them and squeezed it gently. Bill just shook his head.

“Why did you come back then?”

Dipper looked onto their hands and thought about it.

“After the dreams that followed I understood that you had no control over the dreams and that you tried to ...respect my wishes.”

His throat felt dry.

“You treated me well and I.. I was very enthusiastic but you did not take advantage of it.. not in the extend you could have.”

He avoided Bills eyes.

“I was hasty and I realized it too late.”

It was silent and when he dared to look into Bills eyes, the other looked him expectant.

“So… what do you want now?”

Hearing that, Dippers nerves gave out and tears started to well up in his eyes. He was right about to stuff his shirt into his mouth. Speaking up about his feelings was too stressful with the amount of lack of sleep he had himself.

Embarrassed, he squeezed his eyes shut and felt one tear seep into the pillowcase pressed to his cheek.

A chuckle reached his ears and he felt the bed dip briefly as Bill leaned over him, gently pushing him to his back.

“Sorry Pine Tree, I was just messing with you there.”

Soft lips grazed his cheeks close to his eye and Dipper blinked, a rattling breath leaving his chest trough his nose. Bill was close and smiling, his hair tickling Dippers face as their noses almost touched.

Dipper reached up, tangled a hand in the blond strands and pushed himself up to meet his lips.

The kiss was soft, lips gently sliding. Dipper settled back down and pulled Bill with him. Mouths opened against each other and Dipper grabbed onto Bills shirt.

Bill bit down on Dippers button lip, making him jump. When Bill pulled back he smiled like the devil himself.

“I will mess you up, kid.”

Dipper licked his lips and nodded.

The devil smiled even more before he leaned down to kiss him again.


	9. In the dark

Dipper slowly opened his eyes, but the sun was blinding in the bright blue sky and he quickly closed them again.

The skin of his face was toasty warm from lying in the sun. He could feel patches of sticky dried up popsicle on his cheek when he scrunched up his face, but he had no intention to move yet. His limbs, stretched into every direction away from his body in the grass, were heavy with warmth from running and laughing and wrestling his twin all day. It was a perfect summer day.

He could hear Mabel nearby, talking to Waddels. It was her baby-talk voice that gave her conversation partner away. He was sure if he turned his head he would see her, holding the pigs feet in her hands. But he did not move.

-

When he opened his eyes, it was still warm, but he was in the dark and in a room, not under the starry night sky.

Bill was moving around next to him. It was dark and for half a second Dipper didn’t know what was happening.

He smiled gently to himself when he remembered where he was.

The sheets were warm with their shared body heat and for the first time in days, Dipper felt content.

After more initial confusion, he realized that Bill was undressing himself.

Both of them had been too exhausted to do much more than kissing each other senseless just to fall asleep in their clothes from the day before.

He smiled sleepily and watched in the light of the street lamp outside how Bill undressed except for his briefs and undershirt.

Soon enough Bill turned towards him and noticed he was awake.

“You should get out of yours as well, you shouldn’t sleep with jeans on,” he whispered.

Dipper just groaned. “No thanks, I’ll deal.”

An unmanly shriek left him when Bill pulled his covers off him. Before he could move, Bill was at his zipper and pulled his jeans down, leaving Dipper to laugh about how silly he looked while he held on to his boxers. He had never been undressed with such determination. His heart drummed in his ears and almost choked his laugh, but he tried his best to keep it cool.

“Planning to ravish me in my sleep? That’s not very gentleman of you, Mr. Cipher.”

“In your dreams, Mr. Pines.”

Dipper snorted, shook his head at the bad joke and let it go.

Bill seemed to be fine with the result and pulled the covers back over them. He wrapped his arms around Dipper and they shifted for a second before settling down comfortably. Dippers head rested on Bills shoulder and could feel his chest rising with each breath and hear his heart beating.

Dipper closed his eyes, intend to sleep again. He was dead tired and his limbs felt heavy and warm with sleep, just like in his dream.

But his body wasn’t having any of it.

Cuddling with minimal clothing had Dippers senses going haywire and he groaned as he grew hot.

“That was a stupid idea.”

Bill hummed in agreement and Dipper hit his chest lightly. Bills laugh was airy and a little batty. Dipper shook his head, burying his cheek in Bills shoulder. He thought back to his dream, in which Bill had not appeared.

“How are you even awake. You were skipping sleep on how many days?”

One of Bills hands was playing with the hem of his T-Shirt as he hummed a little grouchily, deeming it enough of an answer. Dippers breath came out short when Bills fingers brushed his stomach by accident. The hand stilled and he could tell hear him swallow.

“Maybe I should take the couch,” Bill suggested, but he didn’t sound too convinced.

Every inch of Dipper wanted to touch more, to be touched, but his mind made him falter. They had just made up hours ago, hadn’t even talked about anything yet.

Dipper sprawled his hand against Bills stomach and felt him tense up under his fingers. He bit his lip. Shit, he was really awake now.

Raising his head a little, he looked up to Bill.

“.. just stay here?”

Bill was watching him for a second, then he made a move to sit up. In a fit of panic, Dipper got up as well and moved to straddle his hips, grabbing his shoulders for balance.

Bills face was closer now and he raised a brow at him. His voice was barely there.

“You said you just wanted to talk earlier.”

Dipper winced a little at that, but Bill wasn’t pushing him away.

“Yeah, sorry…”

He tried to climb off his lap but Bill held him down. Warm hands pushed up his thighs, thumbs brushing over the insides. Fingertips barely sliding underneath the material of his ridden-up boxers. Dipper didn’t know why it was so difficult to breath from just that.

“You are always rushing things.”

Dipper wasn’t sure what to say, he hadn’t planned to do anything.

Bills lips were against his neck, trapping Dippers arms between them. The touch was gentle and Dipper pressed closer against him. He was way too aroused already and Bill was right. He had rushed their first kiss and he was being needy from just being close to him now. But when he pushed his hips against Bills he could feel that the other was having the same troubles.

Bills breath hitched again and it sounded amazing in Dippers ears. Even with his mind racing to find words to express why this was ok, why it should be ok, he couldn’t keep himself from rolling his hips against Bill again.

A weak laugh erupted Bills chest and he pushed Dipper back lightly to look at him.

“You really are something...”

Dippers face felt like it was burning but he tried to stay calm.

“Sorry, I guess it just feels nice...” he ended lamely.

Bill smiled at him and it was the soft, gentle smile that Dipper had missed. He really had missed Bill so badly, he had been too occupied with his worries to notice.

He touched Bills cheek and gently traced around the shell of his ear. Maybe it was dangerous to just assume that they were ok. A hitched breath left his lips as Bill rolled his hips upwards against his, and he rested his forehead against Bills and closed his eyes.

He tried to sort his thoughts. For all this time, while he was having these vivid dreams, Bill had known that Dipper was a real person. And upon meeting him, he had tried to start a normal relationship with him. Now that the facts were on the table, Dipper found it hard not to fall for Bill even more.

Bills hands rested on his hips, holding him close as they moved together, trapped erections separated by soft material. The small movements were hesitant still, but Dipper could feel a warmth rolling down his body into his lower half. He was light headed all of a sudden and held harder on to Bills shoulders.

A low chuckle from Bill had him open his eyes. Mischief glinted up to him from honey colored eyes, barely brown in the darkness. An arm wound around his back and Bill dipped him backwards, never breaking his gaze. Blood rushed into Dippers cheeks as he held onto him, too surprised to do much more than open his mouth. Bill didn’t push him onto the bed but loomed over him instead, holding him in place.

“You dug your own grave, Pines. I was going to be a gentleman. But now it’s too late to stop.”

Dipper stared up to him with wide eyes, his whole face aflame and breath uneven.

“It’s never too late to stop.” He said in a daze, just to talk back, just because.

Bills smile grew a bit wider, his eyes a bit smaller with mirth.

“So, you want to stop?”

Dipper swallowed and shook his head. He could barely see Bills delighted smile before he was kissed sweetly. He expected to be lowered onto the mattress but instead, Bill pulled him upright again. Bill let go of his back and placed a kiss below his ear.

“Hold on to me.”

He wrapped his arms around Bills neck, unsure what to expect. One of Bills arms stayed wrapped around him, holding him at the small of his back. The other hand of his made its way between them. Dipper tensed when Bill freed his erection from his boxers and wrapped his fingers around him, stroking him slowly. He let go of a breathy moan without a second thought, burying his face in Bills neck.

The feeling was miles away from what he knew from touching himself. From someone else touching him in the past.

Bill took his time to caress him and while it struck Dipper as odd that he wasn’t touching Bill back, he was glad that he didn’t have to. His arms were fully occupied clinging to Bill.

He really wished he could see the look on Bills face while he touched him. See his hand on him. But he did not dare to look. Instead, he pressed his eyes closed, reveling in the feeling of the touch of Bills hand.

His thighs trembled when he came, not lasting long, his hair sticking to his forehead, short pants pushing hot air against Bills skin and back into his face.

The feeling that washed over his body and left him curling in warmth and complete ease, like he was leaning against a cotton bud instead of a solid chest.

In a fit of boldness his own hand wormed between them, easily pressing Bills erection up against his belly. The shoulder he was leaning against went rigid but a strangled moan urged him to go on.

As he wrapped his fingers around Bill and opened his eyes, wondering about the new perspective of a dick in his hand that wasn’t his own, he heard Bills take another sharp breath. Still high on his orgasm, he started to stroke up and down, his fingers still loose, getting used to the feeling. He let his chin rest on Bills shoulder, enjoying in the small moans he received.

Maybe next time, they could do something else. He could sit on his lap again, but this time Bill could be buried inside of him, moving with him.

An unexpected moan left Dippers lips and he could feel Bill shiver beneath him. Those arms pulled him closer, crushed him against his chest as Bill came and shuddered a breath into Dippers neck.

Dipper breathed with him, resting his cheek against him. He moved his head to hide his face against Bills neck. A hand job was such a simple thing if he compared it to all the things one could do, but what they just did felt so earth-shattering to Dipper.

For the first time since they stopped talking, Dipper leaned back and dared to look into Bills face. Bill looked properly stirred up, his eyes still unfocused from lust as he caressed Dippers cheek.

Dipper smiled and pushed up to kiss Bills surprised face.

He didn’t know what Bill hat expected but he had plenty of time to ask him later, tomorrow, and for all of their future. But for now, he was taken away by happiness and sleep that creeped into his body without him noticing.

-

When Dipper woke up he was alone. After a few moments of lying almost completely still, he realized that the rushing sound from nearby was probably a shower.

The room looked a lot different now in broad daylight.

When Dipper finally managed to sit up, he was very much aware of how low his boxers rode his hips and that his T-shirt was ruined.

A door right to the bedroom opened. Dipper had not noticed the shower had stopped, but Bill was stepping into the bedroom now, only stopping when he realized Dipper was awake.

Bill was only wearing sweatpants, a towel draped over his wet hair and shoulders and he was regarding Dipper with a rather careful look.

Dipper on his side blinked against the sleepiness in his system and let himself distracted with the sight of Bills bare chest. He has probably missed half of his classes of the day already. Why was Bill watching him so doubtful? Was he waiting for Dipper to get angry and leave?

That was the farthest from what Dipper wanted to do.

Instead, a smile spread over his face and while he made sure that the blanked had him covered, all he wanted right now was to get the blonde idiot back into the bed.

Said idiot was clearly infected with Dippers smile as his features softened and he strolled over to the bed.

“Not fair, you already got to brush your teeth!” Dipper complained, aware of his own morning breath as he pulled Bill down by his shoulders.

“Good morning to you, too.”

Chuckling lightly, Bill brushed back his bangs to kiss his forehead but faltered.

Dipper cringed a little at the touch, ever so insecure about his forehead but swallowing down his protests. Bill on the other side was clearly taken aback as he traced the marks on Dippers forehead.

“You really have those...” he whispered, his eyes darting to Dippers. Dipper strained a smile. His heart in his chest missing a beat.

“Yeah... not everything we shared in the dreams is made up I guess... “

He was cut off by firm lips pressed up against his. He blinked but Bills eyes were closed in an almost pained expression. Letting go of a sigh though his nose, he pulled Bill closer. His own eyes fell closed as he returned the kiss, Bills shoulders relaxing under his fingers.

Maybe he had been too fast to think their situation was all cleared up. But he was fine with working it out from here. More than fine even.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suprise!


	10. Reality

Bill opened the door to his flat with jingling keys and stepped inside. The door fell closed with a bang. As soon as the silence settled he looked down the hallway and paused, listening into the flat. It was quiet, pleasantly so.

He started moving again and shrugged off his coat impatiently. He had to pause halfway to put the paper bag and keys in his hand aside. Hanging his coat on the rack, he grabbed the bag and headed into the kitchen.

Once he reached the doorway he paused again.

Bill Cipher was, at 26 years old, a grown man. His coworkers liked to tell him that he was just a big child but a few points contradicted this. He had a desk job which he was good at, selling seemingly useless construction plans. He had a knack at selling people things that didn’t really benefit them. His complaint rate ran pretty low as well. He just had a good eye for odd things and how to use them. His coworkers hated him for it because they stuck to the regular deals and they just couldn’t stand out with that.

And before he knew it he was living a comfortable life and hiring a cleaning lady. He even developed an interest in business fashion while a lot of his peers hated dealing with it.

If he contemplated this, his lifestyle and his dress shoes, Bill was a very grown up man. (He just had a weird peculiarity whenever he slept which had messed up his head and jumbled his whole life a bit. But as previously stated, his life wasn’t that bad.)

But when he watched his lover (boyfriend? partner?) and his hunched back, looking down onto what was probably his phone, he felt stupid like a 12-year-old.

(12-year-olds were probably smarter than he imagined but that was beside the point.)

Bills shirt looked a little big on him. Dipper wasn’t really smaller than him, at most Bills shoulders were a little broader than his (which wasn’t hard since Pine Tree was, frankly, a beanpole). No, Bill had left him one of his bigger shirts on the bed to wear after his shower and he did not regret it. Dippers hair was mostly dry but a few damp strands curled in his neck.

Dipper turned his head and smiled at him lazily. Bill could tell that he was tired.

He drew a breath. This was still very new in every way of the word. How did people normally react to this? As little as he would like to admit it, Bill had never tried to have a relationship. Taking someone to bed was one thing, this was totally different. And the fact that it was Pine Tree sitting there, even after he knew Bills weird side, wasn’t something he was prepared for.

He felt a bit stupid because he had agreed to dating but was taken by surprise that it might work out. How did it work though?

He settled for a greeting kiss and Pine Tree did not seem to mind at all.

-

While Bill made coffee and placed plates on the counter, Dipper got up and returned with an envelope in his hand.

“I almost forgot, your colleague gave this to me yesterday. The tall one with the glasses?”

Bill looked over to him, a little confused. Dipper made a gesture to simulate a fringe in an attempt to describe his friend.

Bill snorted. “You didn’t even get his name? Rude,” he said mockingly as he eyed the envelope.

Dipper let his hand fall and frowned at him. “Well, someone didn’t introduce me last time.”

Bill made a face and took the envelope. “So that they can look you up on Facebook? No thank you.”

“My Facebook account barely has anything on it.” Dipper lamented.

“I know,” Bill retorted, sidetracked by the piece of paper. It looked familiar. Peeking inside, he only grew more puzzled. He pulled out a few slips of paper before he stuffed them back in. “This doesn’t make any sense, he sent this to me last week to review and I returned it already.”

Dipper sat down again and starred on to the counter, looking a little embarrassed. He hesitated while Bill stared onto the envelope, a little pucker between his brows.  

“Maybe it was too obvious that I did not know your address. I think he wanted to help me.”

Bills eyebrows shot up. That actually made sense. Bill placed the envelope aside. He would thank Ted later.

He thought about it for a second.

“You went to my workplace.”

Dipper looked up. “Yes?” His eyebrows drew a little closer together. “That’s how I got here. You never told me where you live.” He paused. “Did you really call in sick?”

Maybe he would also punch Ted a little. He did his best to keep a straight face.

 “My boss told me to take a few days off because I looked like shit and I had too much unused vacations days anyway, so technically, no.”

He turned away to get the coffee. It didn’t escape him how bothered Dipper looked. When he turned back and filled the cups, Dipper had already guarded his expression again.

“Milk or sugar?”

“Both.”

A slight smile tugged on the corner of his mouth when he placed both on the counter before he moved to sit himself. He knew already. He would never forget the sea of milky beige latte Dipper had left behind after the first real glimpse he had gotten of him. That patch of floor had been sticky for the rest of that day. Sitting there with Dipper had been so exciting. Very much like it was now.

Since the morning everything that had happened the day before slowly cached up to Bill.  Dipper had come to see him, put him to bed, apologized even. Also, quite a lot of other things that had Bill feeling warm under his collar whenever he thought about it. It was a lot to take in and very sudden as well. The lack of sleep was still heavy in his limps, although it was easy to ignore for now with the sudden relief.

Dipper looked at him sideways, not touching his food. He struggled for words before he looked down.

They had started that day with a few… discussions, to put it friendly.

Firstly, Dipper had wanted him to stay in bed. It had been a weird conversation but Bill had convinced him that he wasn’t used to sleeping long time spans and that it would only get him a bad head ache. This got him a thoughtful look and Dipper had reluctantly agreed.

Secondly Bills fridge was completely empty and Dipper had been adamant to head out to buy something but Bill had set his foot down that he would take care of it, not his guest.

The morning was strewn with Dippers defeats but he didn’t seem to mind. He was relentlessly trying to take care of Bill, who wasn’t used to be fussed over but didn’t complain.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to come.”

Bill looked up, snapping back into reality. He shook his head. “Don’t be, I didn’t expect you to.”

The pained expression was back on Dippers face and Bill could not stand it at all. After a moment, Dipper leaned over and placed his head on Bills shoulder, making him freeze up completely. A part of him wondered if he was supposed to feel stricken as well. It seemed like Dipper was battling with his emotions more than he did right now. But he was just exhausted and most of all extremely relieved. A silent bliss had caught on to him, the one you felt when pain stopped after enduring it for a long time.

The last days had been hard. A bad patch was easier to live through if one knew that it would pass. But Bill had feared that their dreams would only end if his affection for Dipper waned. And he had not expected that to happen anytime soon.

He rested his cheek against Dippers hair slightly.

He also patted Dippers lower back.

“There, there.”

Dipper snorted and sat back up, shooting him an amused look before he started eating.

Bill wondered if it was normal what he was feeling towards this man.

He wanted to kiss Dipper all the time. Which he was allowed to do now. Well, maybe in decent amounts.

While he ate as well (and smiled triumphantly over Dippers expressions of delight about the taste) he wondered again. What was the normal approach at this point? Would they not see each other for a few days? Didn’t normal people not call each other for a few days? Or did that only apply to dating?

Bill was weirded out by everything he believed to know about normal people relationships. Before this day, he had not seen himself as this clueless.

Beside him, Dipper pulled out his phone.

“I’m sorry,” Dipper looked over to him, apologetic, “my friend keeps sending me the notes from the lecture this morning.”

Bills brows shot up.  “You missed one? I didn’t know...”

Dippers smile looked positively guilty now. “I already skipped the last one yesterday to be honest.” His eyes returned to the screen as more files appeared. His friend was apparently really fussy about notes. What a nerd.

“Are there more today? Maybe you should go.” Bill offered, trying his best to sound  lighthearted.

Dipper looked up, a little alarmed.

“I didn’t mean to sound like I needed to.”

Bill took a sip of his coffee. “But you could.”

“Are you sure?” Dipper furrowed his brows a little, looking torn.  

“Yes, I’ll take a nap later anyway.” For a second Bill weighed again what was appropriate before he stopped caring altogether. “We could meet up for dinner?”

Dippers face lit up. “Sound good! You still have to fill me in on some details, I’m not letting that go so easily! Also, it’s Friday, I’m free on the weekend so we could spend time more then.”

Bill smiled into his cup. “Sounds perfect.”

Dipper smiled as well, visibly pleased with himself. Bill observed him for a moment, taking in the sight. He set down his cup. “I think I’m sorry, too. That I didn’t tell you right away.”

Dipper looked up, eyes wide. He opened his mouth but no word passed his lips. Bill scrunched up his nose, starting to feel uneasy.

Dipper blinked and closed his mouth, his face glowing bright red.

“You think?” Dipper said, doing a really bad job at his mocking tone. Bill almost pouted. Dipper smiled quickly. “Sorry, I just didn’t expect that. Don’t worry about it.”

Of course, Bill hadn’t been worried. He just felt better because Dipper looked nice when he smiled.

-

 “He’s such a shy guy, it’s really scary when he gets angry. I think I need to be a better friend for him, I have really tried his nerves the last weeks.” Dipper laughed but he really felt bad. Will was too nice to drop Dipper for the mess he’s been but he did not want to cause him any more trouble. 

Bill laughed with him and smiled over his glass of booze. “He sounds like a good friend. Everyone needs a wigging once in a while.”

“Then who scolds you usually?” Dipper asked. It was questionable if Bill did get enough wigging in his opinion. He was too smug all of the time and slowly recovered to his peak form. Something Dipper couldn’t see enough of.

Bill just shrugged and took a sip. “Ted usually does it.”

“Your coworker?”

Bill nodded and Dippers eyes lit up on the new piece of information.

“But he does it so much that I’m not sure if it’s just his way of talking.”

Dipper raised an eyebrow and swiveled his own glass. “Well he didn’t scold me so it must be you.”

“He’s just polite, when you get to know him better he will do it. I promise.”

“Sure, just tell yourself that.”

Bill narrowed his eyes at him but a playful smile gave him away.

They were in a small diner close to Dippers flat. He liked it here, it was private. As private as it gets in a diner.

Absentminded he reached out over the table and touched Bills hand lightly, tracing his fingers. Bill turned his palm upwards and caught Dippers fingers gently with his thumb.

They both looked up and Dipper studied Bills face. He wasn’t even sure if Bill knew how exhausted he looked. But he seemed totally at peace just holding his hand.

In between the comfortable silence, he remembered what he had asked for at breakfast. Within moments, Bill seemed to catch the same train of thought. His smile disappeared slowly and he pulled away his hand. Dipper smiled weakly and tried not to feel hurt. He wasn’t going to complain if Bill needed space to collect his thoughts.

If he was honest to himself it was scary how much he meant to Bill. He only started to realize the extent of it. He wouldn’t treat him so careless again.

“You said it started when you were small?”

Bill eyed his drink absentmindedly.

“It was just a big inconvenience to my parents that wouldn’t stop.” Bill stopped and fell silent. Dipper just waited for him to continue.

After some minutes, Bill leaned his arms on the table, his face straight. His eyes wouldn’t leave the glass.

“When I was a kid, they just wanted me to stop talking about it. But I was just a child and pretty bold about it. I never liked my parents very much. They liked my brother better because he was a pushover.”

“You mentioned your brother,” Dipper said carefully.

Bill laughed dryly and rubbed his forehead. He hadn’t met his eyes since they had started the topic.

“Yeah. I am annoyed about my parents but my brother really got to me. I trusted him because he believed me. But in the end, he just wanted me to stop talking about it, just like the others.”

Dipper couldn’t help but think about Mabel. They had had bad fights as well but thankfully made up every time. Bill waved his hand dismissively.

“There’s nothing to do about that, but-“

“Have you ever tried to contact him?” Dipper cut him off and Bill looked at him, surprised. He closed his mouth and slowly pulled a face, as if the answer tasted bad on his tongue. In the end, he looked away again.

“I tried but he moved and I don’t know his new address.”

Dipper nodded and picked up his own drink. Bills glance followed his hand for a moment, his eyes far away.

“It changed when I was in middle school. I had a dream. Well, my neighbor had a dream. A clean guy, house with garden, a little family.”

A look of apathy crossed Bills face and Dipper couldn’t help himself, he reached out and placed a hand on Bills arm since he had tugged away his hands. Bill blinked at him, a little confused. Then he seemed to remember where he was.

“He dreamed about killing his wife. In great detail. Very graphic.” His brows were furrowed a little and his tone was flat like he was talking about his taxes but a shiver went down Dippers spine. Bill looked at him and smiled thinly.

“It’s fine, really. But my mind couldn’t handle it well back then. My parents send me to therapy, which helped to cope with the impressions, but it was frustrating because they never believed me.”

Bill moved on from the topic quickly but Dipper had a hard time grasping what he was saying.

 “Sometimes therapists acted like they believed me to get on my side but I didn’t buy it, not once. Some wanted to sell cures to my parents and they were so embarrassed about the whole thing. In the end, they just gave up and I moved out as soon as I could.”

Dippers hand was still glued to Bills arm. He didn’t know what to say. Nothing appropriate came to his mind right away. He was sure that Bill had skipped a lot of details but it was the essence of it. It felt strange, the gaps of what he knew filling up but himself feeling deflated instead.

“That’s rough,” he rasped out.

Bill looked at him, unsure. Then he looked into his drink again. “I guess. It passed.” He looked distant and Dipper couldn’t blame him for it. He watched him for a moment before he got up, unsure if he was doing the right thing. Bill looked up, confused. “What are you doing?”

“Move over.” Dipper ordered and squeezed himself next to him on the bench. “I know what will cheer you up now.” He looked up from the table. “Unless you want to talk more right now? I don’t know, it seemed like a lot already?” he started to ramble but Bill just nodded, looking a little relieved. They could practice talking every day from now on, it did not have to be today.

At least he hoped what he had in mind would cheer him up. He pulled out his phone and opened his chat with Mabel.

“Here, watch.”

He tapped the text box and typed ‘Guess what, I made up with Bill’.

He could see Bill eying him warily out of the corner of his vision.

“Isn’t she mad at me?”

“I don’t think so. She’s never mad at hotties.”

Bill opened his mouth but Dippers smirk shut him up.

Both looked back to the phone when it chimed, a flood of happy emoji’s rolling in. A lot of hearts and stars and ‘FINALLY’ in big sparkling letters. When he looked over to Bill he caught him smiling to himself. He leaned into Bills side and kissed his cheek.

“Thank you for telling me. I believe you, that’s something, right? And Mabel does too by the way.”

Bill rolled his eyes a little, but he also looked a little happier.

-

The night air was still stuffy, loaded with the heat of the day but it had cooled down after sunset. It was soothing as it swept around them.

Is was late when they walked back to Dippers flat. Dipper wasn’t sure if Bill was just accompanying him or if he was planning on staying with him and he didn’t ask, he just enjoyed the spark of excitement as they headed towards his front door.

When they reached it, they stood in silence for a moment, breathing in the night air.

In the end, it was Bill who moved first and stepped closer, kissing him gently. He felt a hand on his side and Dipper reached up, bracing himself against Bills shoulders.

It was thrilling to kiss Bill, to be allowed to so without fearing it to end or to be cut short. Their lips moved across each other’s lazily and Dipper could have stayed like this forever.

Except when Bills tongue grazed his top lip and his hands suddenly gripped the back of Bills head instead of his shoulders.

He opened his mouth to him without a second thought.

Taking distracted steps backwards when Bill pushed him, deliberately leading him to the wall beside his door, all Dipper cared about was where he and Bill connected, where Bills body pressed up against him. He was about ready to give in and surrender his body when Bill pried himself loose, breathing heavily against Dippers neck.

“I can’t do this tonight.”

Dipper blinked, confused by the street lights and the tranquility that ordained the quiet street but not them. His body tingled but his brain slowly cached up to the words.

Against the direction of his words, Bills lips pressed against his neck and Dipper bit back a noise.

Bill stopped, hasty. “I want to, but. my head is just spinning. Sorry... I don’t want it to be like this...”

The words moved something inside Dippers chest. So Bill turning him down but for the best reasons. Dipper struggled with his self-control. He just knew he could convince Bill to come upstairs but he fought his urges since it was just plain wrong.

“Ok.” He breathed, calming himself down. “Sorry, I got carried away” he mumbled and his own heavy breathing sounded loud in his ears.

At least Bill wasn’t in his bed while he confessed this so close to his ear. It was much easier to stay reasonable out in the public.

He swallowed and pushed back on Bills chest a little to look at him. “There’s no point if you don’t enjoy it.”

If took a second before Bill met his gaze. Dipper framed his face with his hands. “Do you still want me to come tomorrow?” he asked, searching his eyes for any sign that Bill might be overwhelmed. He had agreed to spending the weekend so quickly, maybe Dipper had gone too far and Bill was just going along with it.

Bill grabbed his shoulders, looking alarmed. “Why wouldn’t I?”

Dipper smiled breathlessly at him. Bill just blinked back. “Don’t try to drift away,” he breathed out.

Dipper swallowed, his smile lost. He couldn’t handle the look on his face, pulling him closer to kiss him again. Softer again this time.

He heard footsteps come closer and listened to them pass. Bill stepped closer to him, trapping him against the wall again. He wasn’t sure if he could feel Bills erection press against his leg and bit back another moan, breaking the kiss. He rested his head back against the wall, just breathing for a second and holding Bill close to him. The coolness of the night was gone, all he could feel was heat.

“You should go now if you want to go,” Dipper rasped out.

“I should bring you upstairs, looking like that.”

Dipper didn’t know what he looked like but he could guess.

He smiled and shook his head. “I don’t know if I could let you go then.”

Bills breath was ghosting along his neck and Dipper gently shoved him away from him at last.  

“Goodnight, Bill.”

“Goodnight Pine Tree.”

And as Dipper watched his back when Bill walked back to the station his body ached to hold him close for the night.


	11. Pine Tree

The apartment was dark and Bill stared up to the ceiling, unseeing.

Sleep wouldn’t come to him easily these days and he didn’t know why.

He sighed and rolled onto his side.

It’s been two weeks since Dipper had started to come over whenever there was time to spend and he stayed the night more often than not. Within days Bill had come to hate sleeping alone. Which was a little pathetic in his own honest opinion but it wasn’t that he couldn’t sleep alone. It was just way better when Pine Tree was with him.

He wasn’t even sure if Dipper would come over today, he was out bar hopping with his friends. They had never had agreed on anything, Dipper just kept coming back to his (supposedly because Bills bed was nicer). There was a chance that Bill would just lie awake until his alarm for work rang. In about 3 hours.

He rubbed his face and cursed into his hand. He wasn’t such a sap, why couldn’t he just fall asleep? Maybe Dipper was already fast asleep in his own bed.

He was interrupted from his sulking when the door to the apartment opened and closed.

Bill ceased all signs of wakefulness and closed his eyes.

He could hear shuffling from the hallway, then the bedroom door opening slowly. Bill wondered just how drunk Dipper was until he realized he was probably trying to be quiet.

The faint clicking of the door being shut followed and rustling of clothing while Pine Tree undressed. A little dip in the mattress, then another. Dippers tentative searching hand edged closer over the mattress to determine where he was lying. Bill opened his eyes just a little, his eyes more used to the darkness than Dippers. He reached out his hand and met Dippers halfway.

“Jesus Christ!” gasped Dipper, making Bill chuckle quietly. Dipper weaved their fingers together and slumped down to Bills side. He placed a sloppily kiss on the corner of Bills mouth before he dropped his head beside his shoulder.

“How drunk are you?”

“.. ‘little. G’night.” Dipper said to the mattress.

Bill smiled to himself and closed his eyes, his eyelids suddenly heavy.

\--

Dippers eyes snapped open and he gasped, pressing both hands to his eyes. The darkness of the bedroom was consuming after the flood of images he had just lived through.

He was covered in cold sweat and shivered, unable to move right away. The room seemed to spin when he closed his eyes so he blinked them open.

The figure next to him was awake as well, he could tell. He didn’t even know if Bill was trying to fake sleep or just didn’t know how to react himself. Well, what did Dipper expect, to be comforted?

When Dippers eyes started to burn his body suddenly sprang into action. He threw back the covers and more or less jumped out of bed, the cold air waking him up even more (good) before he left the room and hurried into the kitchen.

He really didn’t need Bill to see him like this, crying over a stupid nightmare.

Once he was in the kitchen he hit the light switch and raised his arms to examine them.

Nothing. Just bare, intact skin.

He could still imagine the cuts and bruises, could imagine forks driven into his flesh. No way to fight back, to keep it from happening. He closed his eyes but the image of falling down stairs flashed before his eyes and he wrenched them open again.

He could hear cautious footsteps and felt his whole body tense.

Bill had hurt him in his dream, in their dream, and it squashed his insides. How should he react to him right now?

As Bill stepped into the door frame and Dipper turned towards him, he didn’t need to think.

“What the hell?” he flared up, his anger lashing out of his so suddenly he couldn’t stop himself. Bills eyes widened. For a second Dipper expected him to get mad himself, at Dipper and the unfairness of it all, just like Dipper felt. He turned away from him quickly, trying to calm himself down.

Behind him he could hear Bill trying to say something and he froze. He couldn’t remember the last time Bill hadn’t called him by his nickname. It was such an affectionate phrase, it was a fond memory of their first meeting, and it was the last thing Dipper wanted to hear right now. ‘Please don’t say it, please don’t’ he repeated in his head, starring onto the counter.

 “Dipper? “

He looked up and turned, surprised. Bill looked pale and badly suppressed fear was written all over his face. “That wasn’t… me.” Though his voice gave in slightly at the end.

Dipper opened his mouth and closed it again.

‘But you enjoyed it until you woke up.’ Dipper couldn’t bring himself to say it. ‘It was you.’ He couldn’t control their dreams, he knew. The few times he had regained consciousness, this wasn’t the case this time. But why would they dream something like this? Maybe this had been a nightmare. Could they share nightmares as well?

“I have no desire to hurt you.”

Dipper looked up into Bills eyes. He was waiting for Dipper to speak, his eyes red rimmed. He pulled a face and looked down in a vain attempt to hide it.

 Dipper straitened his back.

 “I know you don’t.” He shivered from the memory but the Bill in front of him was solid, warm and human, not demonic at all. “But what was it? This never happened before. Did it ever happen to you?”

Bill furrowed his brows, his face suddenly guarded. “Why would I? You know this is new to me as well. I never shared this kind of dreams like I do with you.”

Dipper dragged a hand over his face, mentally kicking himself.

“Yes, I know, I didn’t forget.”

He looked up to meet Bills eyes again, trying to shake off the dream. Bill was here with him, the real Bill he liked and who cared for him.

He just hated it so much that Bill was hurt, too. He wanted to be angry at him and scream but the one he was angry at had been left behind in that dream. And Bill who always struggled with his dreams was standing in front of him and needed comfort himself when all Dipper wanted was to be held and comforted himself.

He swallowed, slowly realizing how selfish his anger was. And Bill was just waiting.

Slowly he walked over to him, closing the distance between them, to press his face against Bills neck. Arms wrapped around him and he held on to him. A shiver ran down his back, he was cold and hadn’t noticed.

“I mean it. I would never hurt you.” Bills voice was right beside his ear, and Dipper breathed a little more easily.

He leaned back to look at him. He was sulking a little and Dipper managed so smile.

He remembered catching himself thinking that Bill was quite a catch when they had just met. But now, with tousled hair and mildly upset that Dipper could ever question him, he looked like so much more. Dipper hugged him again. “I am the victim. Give me a pass and get me back to bed?”

Bill hesitated for a moment instead of letting go he wrapped his arms around Dippers middle and started walking, slowly, backwards back to the bedroom. By the time they stumbled into bed Dipper had snorted three times and Bill relaxed visibly.

They lay awake for the rest of the night and Bill made sure to kiss every spot of Dippers body that had been injured and then some.

“You still don’t know my first name, do you?” Dipper murmured at 5 a.m. when the sky turned grey.

Bill looked at him and stared for a while.

Dipper smirked at him. “Did you forget?”

Bill narrowed his eyes. “There is no right answer to that.”

Dipper propped his head on his arm. “You realize you could just snatch my wallet and peek on my driver’s license.”

“Whatever would be the fun of that. Do you want me to?”

Dipper contemplated it and huddled closer to Bill.  He smiled and hid his face against his chest. “No. I will tell you at some point. Just wait.”


	12. In and Out

Agent Tront stepped into the command center, relieved by the sudden air-conditioned breeze around his nose. The dark suits did nothing for him in the blazing sun outside.

The room was empty and dark, only illuminated by the blue tinge of dimmed monitors and small status lights on the other electronics. Once his eyes got used to the dim lighting he spotted one agent hunched over one of the monitors, typing away. There were supposed to be two. Agent Tront could feel his anger rising already.

“Where is Cipher?”

Agent Smith did not even look up.

“He’s got a message and is meeting with his snitch.”

Tront grit his teeth. “Then why aren’t you monitoring him?”

Agent Smith finally turned around, looking pissed. Which was unusual because he was the more professional one of his team members. He didn’t say anything, just gestured to a tablet that was sitting on a desk nearby, probably showing Ciphers feed.

Tront walked over and picked it up, only to drop it immediately.

“JESUS CHRIST!” he covered his eyes, trying to wipe the image from his mind. “Why IS HE like that?”

“You scolded him the last time he turned the camera out of the shot.” Smith answered calmly, but also a little chiding.

“Who even allowed him to go? I didn’t.”

Smith just shrugged. “It’s our best informant, a delivery boy of the Pines Family. I don’t know how Cipher got ahold of him but…, “he turned around in his chair again, going back to his own work, “there’s nothing you can do to stop him.”

-

Dipper woke up, disoriented. Whatever he rested his head on was moving, why? It took some seconds to realize that he had fallen asleep with his head on Bills lap, stretched out on his couch. It was a lazy Sunday and he had a paper to finish but here he was, napping away. And from what he could see, Bill had been asleep until just now as well as he blinked blearily.

Dipper stretched and smiled. Bill yawned. Was it too early to get dinner?

“I dreamed something weird. You appeared and at the same time, you didn’t...?”

Bill blinked at him. “Like, a dark room and men in suits?” Dipper felt more awake instantly. “Exactly! How weird is that.” He thought about the dream again. How the Agent that had looked like Bills coworker hat reacted to the image on the screen. Dipper hadn’t seen it. What kind of suspense was that.

“Your imagination is really lazy!” he complained and Bill ruffled his hair. “Who says that is was mine, maybe yours is running out of ideas.”

That could hardly be possible. From the reaction, he could tell what had been on that screen and he did not lack imagination in that department at the moment.

It had been almost two weeks and they hadn’t slept together yet. Well, they slept in the same bed almost every night but... by now, Dipper was slightly worried. He didn’t press the matter because of Bills words all these nights ago but he didn’t know what he was waiting for. And he felt bad for wanting more.

He looked up, doing his best not to look sulky. Bill hardly missed and opportunity to kiss or touch him. Something tightened in his chest. The first night had been fine, right? Or did Bill not like sex? That wasn’t the worst thing but Dipper wanted him to voice something like that.

He tried to be reasonable. If someone else got into a relationship, how fast would they proceed? He couldn’t follow that notion for long. Bill and him weren’t exactly normal. Maybe it was better to think about something else.

“I was your informant. For what, the mafia maybe?” His forehead scrunched up. “But why would I sell them to you?”

Bill shrugged. “Who knows? I don’t think we’ll ever find out, which is sad, I liked it.” He yawned again. Bills sleeping pattern were shit but Dipper wasn’t going to judge him. And he was right, they had never continued a dream once it ended.

Dippers stomach growled. Bill laughed. “Do you want dinner?” Dipper blushed and sat up. “What time is it?”

Bill shrugged. “Doesn’t matter, time is an illusion anyway.”

-

Agent Cipher was finally, finally at the end of his mission and he was just a little pleased.

He just knew how much Agent Smith looked forward to seeing him to debrief the mission. He always loved listening how exceptional skillful Bill had handled his missions. Smith himself rarely got send on any risky tasks and Bill knew he loved the safety but loathed that Bill had the better stories to tell.

An underling of the mafia family he just successfully infiltrated was leading him to the jackpot: The head of the family. He had gained their trust over months and finally, he was granted an audience. He hadn’t seen them yet since they kept their identities classified. All Bill knew was that he was about to step into a room with three people and his assignment read: no survivors.

The man opened a door and let him step trough and Bill slapped the best smile he could manage on his face, his satisfaction showing through. His smugness died on the view he was getting but his smile stayed, keeping the appearances.

The Pines Family.

Everyone knew about the Pines.

No one fucked with the Pines.

This wasn’t just any family. It was the most dangerous family there was and Bill didn’t even know they leaded this entity, too.

And no one knew what the Pines looked like, but just by the rumors it stood out a mile. The older twins and the heir twins. A family of four. Only three people sat around the small table, easily recognizable as family by their resemblance.

Bill knew after one look that he had walked into a death trap. The deadliest of all the criminal families in this state and he was assigned to eliminate only three out of four.

On the right sat a wintery man with grayed hair. From his well-kept looks Bill concluded that it had to be Ford, the leader of the family. He was known for his outstanding intelligence that held their business together. It was also said that he had a special talent to drive people into insanity with drugs and mind tricks.

His twin and hatchet man, Stan, wasn’t present. The worst choice of enemy. A violent brute that wasn’t as smart as his brother but cunning nonetheless and a family man.

Next to Ford sat a young woman with flowing brown hair and a sparkling shine in her eyes, beaming over to Bill. She looked way too bright to be a criminal. Shooting Star, the princess and apple of the eye of the family.

And next to her sat.

Pine Tree.

Bill started to sweat.

Pine Tree was a delivery boy. His source. But he was sitting there where the Dipper was supposed to sit. The apprentice of Ford. Soon to run the biggest cartel in the west alongside his sister.

He was lacking his vest and hat but it was him. He held Bills gaze for a second. Then he started to smile. The smile was subtle but he looked oh so pleased, leaning his chin against his hand.

Bill started to sweat more.

His informant was the heir of the family.

Which he had sloppily slept with on multiple occasions.

His mission was easy. He could take them down, it was what he was trained for.

His agency wanted him gone, that was for sure, too.

“Well, well, well,” he lamented, shrugging of his coat and folding it over his arm so he had his hands free.

It was an easy enough decision to be made.

“Excuse me, does anyone of you carry a melon baller? Didn’t think so, that’s a shame but this will do.”

Confusion spread across their faces while Bill took off his glasses, dropped them and pulled a flexible knife out of his sleeve only to ram it into his eye socket.

He would have loved to pay more attention to their reactions but he didn’t have much time.

Clenching his jaw to muffle a scream he yanked the knife and tore the eyeball out if it’s spot. Shooting Star screamed and it hurt more than he anticipated, he wasn’t even sure if he did it right but there was no point to wait and see. He wasn't sure if he was fainting either. As long as his body obeyed him he kept moving.

He tossed the bloody thing aside and cast his coat over it, already hearing a sizzle. Ford stood and walked towards him, bellowing questions Bill couldn’t heed right now, squatting down. He heard more footsteps and barely registered that Ford didn’t reach him.

His agency had its ways to monitor them and there was one left. He dragged up his pant leg and cut the chip that surveilled his vital signs out as well, tossing it aside. He fell to his bottom and pressed his sleeve to the gaping hole on his face, finally loosing focus.

Hands grabbed his sides and he zeroed in on the person in front of him. It was Pine Tree, looking panicked. Behind him he could see Ford inspecting what was left of his eyeball. The microchip attached to it had most likely fried it already. Better one eye than his whole brain.

He knew Pine Tree was speaking but it was hard to follow with the blinding pain in his skull.

He did look worried.

How nice of him.

-

The blood was still caulking the blond hair to the mans skull. Dipper could forgive that, the injury was treated and that mattered most.

Cipher lay in front of him on a stretcher, unconscious and his wounds dressed. The doctor had grumbled about the messy cuts but said it wasn’t too serious and that it would heal.

What an idiot.

While he waited for him to wake up he came up with all kinds of insults. Finally he had the opportunity to rub Agent Ciphers error into his face and the guy flat out almost kills himself.

To be fair he basically did the opposite, he tried to stay alive by the looks of it. He betrayed his agency and escaped his liquidation. Dipper just didn’t know yet if it was out of survival instinct or.. something else.

A groan had him look up and Cipher was clutching his face.

“Fuck.”

“You messed up your eyelid pretty bad but the optic nerve was well executed.” Dipper said, crossing his arms. “That’s what the doctor said.”

Bill squinted at him, baffled. A nice change for once. They fell silent and Cipher slowly sat up, turning pale. Then he looked Dipper up and down.

“The Dipper. I can’t believe you.” Bill looked like shit, barely keeping his eye open. Dipper made a face.

“’Dipper’ is enough actually. Now let’s not stall, I have a question. Will you work for me or not?”

Bill remained silent for a while, panting a little. Dipper would call for more painkillers later.

“Would you want me to is the question, I am a liar after all.” He managed to smile somehow.

Dipper rolled his eyes. “You wouldn’t be able to speak if I would not consider it.”

Bill started to laugh but stopped quickly, groaning.

“Ok kid. Maybe if you need a sniper, I figure they only need one eye.”

“I need a bodyguard.” I need someone closer to me. 

Bill eyed him, calculating. Dipper could see the gears turning behind his eyes.

Finally, a nod.

Dipper tried not to look pleased. “Good. I have another question. Are you gay?”

Bill looked like his other eye might pop out of his skull as well. “What? Why is that important?!”

Dippers cheeks grew hot. “You are my sisters type and I would have to kill you if you get to close too her.”

“You think I’d sleep with her?”

Dipper snorted dismissively “You slept with me just to get information.”

A smile spread over Ciphers face and it looked painful but he seemed to endure it to enjoy the moment. “Oh, I didn’t sleep with you for information.”

The heat prickled over Dippers neck up into his face and his ears. Bill was maimed but he still flirted with full force. He hummed into Dippers silence and took Dippers limp hand from his knee.

“Alright. Sounds exciting.”

“You are insane.” Dipper wasn’t sure if it was making a joke or realizing the truth.

The smile on the damned face only grew, suddenly closer.

“Maybe. Presumably. By all means.”

And Dipper accepted the kiss, leaning forward.

He would fill Bill on the details later. The no-kill policy Mable had established and how he had fed Bills agency information to end their competition. There was plenty left to wipe the pleased smiled off his face.

-

The alarm blared and Dipper groaned, turning around to hit Bill so he would hurry and turn it off. Bill swore under his breath, hitting the snooze button and falling back into the cushions. It was only time for Bill to get ready to work but Dipper hated it wake up anyway.

He listened to Bills breath for a moment. Suddenly he heard a hitch and turned to look at him, staring into a surprised face.

Dipper tried to catch up until if hit him. “It was the same! The same thing!”

A smile split Bills face and he turned towards him. There was a fondness in his eyes Dipper could barely stand and he shuffled closer to press a kiss to Bills face. It was always liberating to kiss him without the circumstances of the dreams they left behind, always in some sort of danger or on the edge of parting.

The kiss wasn’t going as smoothly as he wanted it to because Bill was still smiling like an idiot. Dipper pulled back slightly, scowling at him.

Bill cackled and moved in to kiss him again, this time with feeling and Dipper hummed into it. He loved these dreams but waking up was even better.

-

Dipper awoke deep into the night. It was dark and quiet and he was so tired, why did he wake? His arm moved on its own, reaching out to make out where Bill lay so he could lean onto him before he fell asleep again. His hand found a knee and he was alert within a second.

“Bill?”

He looked up and blinked against the darkness. Bill was silent, leaning against the headboard, but after some seconds Dipper could see that his eyes were open. Dark circles undermined them, grotesquely underlined by the shadows of the night. Dipper held his breath for a second. He didn’t know what was wrong but Bill looked exhausted.

Slowly, Dipper turned and got up on his knees, leaning closer. Bill blinked and returned his look.

Dipper didn’t know what to say. He knew Bill had trouble to sleep a lot and it wasn’t really a question why. He presumed that it was better when he stayed over because he was asleep when Dipper woke up most mornings.

He reached out and cupped Bills cheek with his hand. Bill turned his head and leaned into the touch.

Swallowing sounded so loud in the silence. Dipper let go and took Bills wrist instead, pulling him forward. Bill resisted for an instant before he gave in and leaned forward until his head rested agains Dippers shoulder.

Dipper swallowed again, gently running his fingers through Bills hair. Little by little he could feel Bill relax against him. He just stayed silent and kept playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

He could tell when Bills breath evened out and he was asleep, leaning heavily against Dipper. He waited for a little while longer until he cradled the back of Bills head, leaning forward and sideways until he was laying across the bed. He let go of a breath once Bill was laying down and still asleep. The silence was buzzing in his ears. Scooting down himself, he snuggled up against him and fell asleep in a wink, too tired to think straight.

-

When Dipper awoke, the air was knocked out of his lungs. He was lying on his back and thanked every star in the sky that he was finally awake. 

It had been the worst nightmare yet. He gasped in air and shivered, trying to move as little as possible, willing the sickness in his stomach to stop.

He didn’t know why he always was a child in these damned dreams but everything was bigger and scarier. And Bill.. a triangle with a tophat was one thing, a five-story tall monster vowing to kill him and his sister was something else. 

Next to him, Bill stood up without a word. Dipper watched him pull on a hoodie, his whole body tense. He left in a rush, not looking back and Dipper was too exhausted to hold him back. The sound of the front door falling shut resonated through the flat and Dippers soul. 

His whole body felt sore. He knew he would be unscathed would he check but he didn't. There was no point. The damage was in his mind, not his body. The images of the dream wouldn't stop coming to him, no matter how hard he tried to process them. The first nightmare had been tame in comparison. 

What was he supposed to do? He sat up in the end, feeling weird to be tall, grown up again. In the end, he just waited on the couch for Bill to come back. He didn't want to be in bed when he showed up.

It took hours until he heard a knock on the door. He paled. Did Bill not take any keys with him? Shuffling over to the door he opened up. Bill was outside, not meeting his eyes. "Sorry." He pushed past Dipper. His hair was a mess and Dipper ached but there was nothing he could say that would help. He stayed by the door.

"I think I'll head home. Maybe that's better for today."

Bills head shot up, finally looking at him. He hesitated before he nodded curtly. "I'll call you a cap."

Dipper swallowed, moving to put on his shoes. 

Bill returned after a short phone call. "Do you want me to go downstairs with you?"

Dipper shook his head and he hated how Bills face dropped even more. He wanted to ask for something else but he couldn't bring himself to say it. He was exhausted and Bill was looking worse than he felt. There was no point talking now.

"It's fine, just. Please don't call me Pine Tree anymore. Please?"

Bill barely reacted, he simply raised his hand dismissively and nodded curtly. His eyes wouldn't meet Dippers anymore.

Dipper felt like crying. "I'll text you tomorrow, try to get some sleep?" Again, Bill just nodded. "Ok. Bye."

It was weird to leave without a goodbye kiss but it would be fake right now. Or maybe it would be the right thing to ease both of them. Either way, Dipper didn't dare, so he turned and left quickly.


	13. Epiphany

The silence in Dippers flat was crushing albeit it did nothing but fill every inch and chink.

It was 4 a.m. and Dipper was no further than one step into his place and he had not moved since the door had clicked shut behind him. He had to get up in three hours, two and a half if he wanted to shower. He was still wearing his sweatpants and the t-shirt he had slept in. His encounter with the taxi driver hadn’t been too smooth. Bill had offered to call the taxi but Dipper had forgotten that he’d have to pay for it. A small part of him wondered if Bill actually had planned on paying the taxi too, but Dippers flight had beaten him to it.

With every passing second all Dipper could feel was the dragging ache of regret in his stomach. He shouldn’t have left. Back in Bills flat, leaving was all he could manage to think about. But now?

Leaving without a needed conversation left him lost and slightly sick. His mind was already so tired from the lack of sleep. Stress was clawing at his nerve endings but his brain wouldn’t stop demanding ‘What now?’.

But the thought of going back daunted him even more. He just didn’t know what so say to Bill. He could not live with these nightmares.

So he stepped further into his home. His home that looked small and crooked compared to Bills nice apartment. Did he even have a toothbrush here?

Dipper dropped his bag and fell face first onto his bed, closing his itching eyes.

His relationship with Bill had settled, from something wobbly to something secure. But now Dipper was here, alone and suddenly, he wasn’t so sure anymore. The last weeks he had felt safe, like this was going to last. But what if it would all just end now?

He remembered this feeling. The same worry that had taken ahold of him when he had kissed Bill for the first time. And again, after their fight. But now it was different, right? They wouldn’t just give up now.

It could always come to an end of course, and the thought squeezed Dippers heart. Heck, something could happen to one of them before they had a chance to talk. The notion almost made Dipper grab is phone and call Bill, but what was the point if he didn’t know what to say. There was nothing he could apologize for and he couldn’t say everything was fine either.

He thought back to the first nightmare, how Bill had just kissed it better and they had laughed about it. More than anything he wished himself back into that moment.

Maybe he should call Mabel. But her relationship advice couldn’t cover hellish nightmares and even with her enthusiasm on the topic, it wasn’t like her own relationships ever lasted very long either.

He felt bad for the jab even if he was the only one to hear it. The fatigue was pulling him down. There were no good decisions to be made when he was like this.

Sleep leaked into his body and he let it happen, barely managing to push off his shoes with his feet, too exhausted by the loop of worry in his head.

-

When Will saw him in the classroom it took exactly two glances of him to look mad.

Dipper was glad he waited until he had sat down beside him before Will spoke his mind.

“Dump him already.”

Dipper blinked at his best friend, Wills cheeks were red with heady anger. He was a quiet, winy person but that didn’t mean he wasn’t snarky.

“Uhm, good morning? What do you mean?” Dipper replied lamely. He was glad that he had made it to class, showered even. He was too tired to follow anything too abstract. Not that he didn’t get where Will was heading, but he wasn’t ready to react to it.

Will pressed his lips together, swallowing his words for a moment. Then he spoke under his breath. “This guy you are seeing, he’s not good for you. Every time I see you, you are either stoked or down as heck. That can’t be healthy. You should dump him.”

 Dipper blinked. He smiled weakly and spoke with a lowered voice as well.  “Thanks man, but it’s not completely like that.” His eyes darted to his desk for a second, rapidly trying to find words that would calm Will down and not sound like Dipper was just in denial.

“He’s sick. I had to leave in the middle of the night because it got so bad. It was a rough night.”

The words came to him as an excuse but he found that they didn’t feel like a lie at all. That surprised him more than it should have.

Will paled in seconds and wrung his hands together. “Oh no, sorry! I shouldn’t have assumed.”

Dipper smiled at him, shaking his head. “It’s fine, thank you. I know you care.” Wills worry dimmed a little. “You must be so worried.”

Dipper looked at him, thinking about it. He barely nodded.

The class started before Will could dwell on the topic and he started taking notes in a faithful manner like he always did. Dipper listened for a while too, until he couldn’t take it anymore and pulled out his phone.

For about ten minutes he couldn’t follow the lecture at all, trying to think something to say. At the end, he typed ‘Pick me up after work at the gates?’ and sent it. They had met at the gates of the campus a couple of times, Bill would understand.

He shoved his phone into his bag before he could waste more time checking for a reply every five seconds. He still had half a day to come up with what he would say.

“Do you want to study in the library later?” he whispered to Will, who was already ogleling him with his phone. Normally he would chide him for not paying attention to class (granted, everything Dipper missed was something Will would have to explain later) but he was holding himself back, most likely because he thought Dipper was such a doting boyfriend.

Will lit up at the idea and nodded. Dipper was glad too, it had been a while since they had hang out.

-

When he realized that he had about half an hour left, his mind was still blank.

He was going to have the most awkward stand-off with Bill.

There was a chance that Bill would talk but Dipper wasn’t very hopeful about that. Bill had proven to be a sulk in the past and he would be now.

At least Bill had answered his message right away. ‘Be there at six’ read the screen of Dippers phone after his class and nothing more.

He stared onto his book for a little while longer, not even reading. Maybe Will was right, he was a little bit weird about Bill. If it was normal to be this nervous or not, he’d never know.

After some minutes, Will stopped reading and looked up, a little disoriented. He easily got lost in the books. A look on his phone had him standing up. “I think I’ll go, if that’s ok with you? Then I would still catch the next bus.”

Dipper smiled, shaking his head. “Why would I mind.” Will smiled gratefully and hesitated. “Tell Bill to get well soon!”

It was weird to hear Will say Bills name, Will usually avoided it. Dipper never knew why. Maybe because he didn’t actually know him.

“Thanks, I will. Get home safe.”

Will smiled back and patted Dippers back as he passed him. Dipper sighed once he was out of sight.

The last minutes passed in agonizing slow speed and Dipper started to gather his things. He could wait at the gates just as well.

 

There was a commotion at the gates with some people shouting and a cluster of bystanders strained their necks to see what’s going on. Dipper saw it and walked a big detour around it. His inside were a knot and he had other problems than campus drama.

He held his distance to avoid the crowd but he heard snippets of the shouting.

“At least b… if you’re... believe you’d stoop s…”

The voice that billowed over to him sounded familiar but Dipper couldn’t quite place it. He did his best to ignore it and tried to spot Bill but he wasn’t early apparently.

“Stop shouti.. know ok!?”

Dipper stilled, turning towards the crowd. People were waiting and determining whether there would be a brawl or not, blocking the view. But it had sounded like Bill. A rush of flurry rose up his body and he made his way towards the ruckus, shoving himself past people to get to the middle.

“At least be honest, it can’t be that hard!”

Just a second before he could see them Dipper finally recognized the first voice. It was Will. Dipper had never heard him raise his voice like that, it was so unfamiliar.

Finally reaching them, he couldn’t believe that he was right. Bill and Will were shouting at each other. Dippers best friend and his boyfriend who couldn’t possibly know each other. And Will was properly angry, heat in his face and uncaring about the scene he was making. From what Dipper could catch, Bill wasn’t eager to fight, his hands raised, but he looked angry all the same. Dipper shook his head, unable to process what he was seeing.

“Guys?”

Heads whipped towards him and two faces lit up with relief at his sight. Two uncanny similar faces.

Dipper felt like he was slapped right in his face. How did he not notice this? He had always thought Wills eyes were an unusually light blue. Just like Bills were a weirdly light brown. Wills hair was lighter, his frame smaller but when they stood side by side, anyone could tell they were brothers.

Dipper couldn’t process it but a small part of him wondered what kind of parents named their children Will and Bill.

Will stepped forward first and moved to Dippers side, eyeing Bill warily. Bill on the other side looked more and more confused by the second. For a long moment Dipper just stared into his eyes and Bill stared right back.

“It’s my older brother, he waylaid me and now he says it’s just a coincidence he’s here,” whispered Will, his eyes never leaving Bill. Dipper for his part kept his eyes glued to Bills as well, his heart sinking. ‘Oh no..’ he thought to himself, feeling terrible. Bill still looked confused, but a little less pissed off.

“I didn’t know you two knew each other,” Bill said at last, his tone far from friendly. He was obviously annoyed with Will and his eyes were cold when his gaze flickered towards his brother, but Dipper didn’t buy it. It was just a mask, he could tell by now.

Around them, people started to leave since the chances of a fistfight dissolved already.

Dipper swallowed against his dry throat. He really didn’t want to burst Wills bubble. “Bill, this is Will, my best friend.”

Will looked up to Dipper, confusion finally getting a hold of him. Dipper looked towards him as well. “Will, this is Bill, my boyfriend. He’s here to pick me up.. I’m sorry.”

Will looked at him, turning pale like a ghost. Someone who had been nosy enough to eavesdrop the whole thing whistled and Dipper and Bill looked at them angrily.

“Oh.”

Their eyes shot back towards Will, whose anger had squibbed in an instant. He looked between Dipper and Bill and his shoulders sank. His eyes stayed on Bills and he looked so embarrassed.

“So, you did not come for me,” he whispered, his eyes quickly filling up with tears before he turned and ran.

“Will…” Dipper shouted after him. Bill stepped to his side, his eyes following Will until he was out of sight. The angry look on his face vanished and he just looked puzzled.

Dipper punched him in the side.

“Ouch! What the hell Pines. It wasn’t my fault, he just freaked out!”

Dipper inhaled sharply, only realizing after a second that Bill hadn’t called him Pine Tree like he had expected. The embarrassment only fueled him.

“And you didn’t freak out?!” Bill shot him a nasty look and rubbed his side. They stood awkwardly, Bill looked lost.

Dipper furrowed his brows. “Well I am giving you a hint, I’m not going on a date with you now.”

Bill only managed to look more lost. “What? Were you? Why not? What should I do about it?”

Dipper shook his head. He didn’t want to intervene but...

“All I know is that if that had been Mabel.” He stared into Bills eyes. “I’d run.”

Still unsure, Bill looked into the direction Will had left. Dipper pulled a face.

“Do you really need me to tell you what to do?!”

It took a second more but a small smile appeared on Bills face and he shook his head. Before he could react, Bill had Dippers face in his hands and pressed a kiss to his lips before he let go and started to run after his brother.

Dipper watched his back until he disappeared as well. He guessed that Will didn’t make if far since he’d been crying. He slowly followed them.

Will was Bills brother. Dipper felt numb over the discovery.

And Bill had kissed him.

Dipper stopped walking. He hadn’t realized how deeply the nightmares had affected him. He had tried to brush them off because they weren’t real, but it was all backwards. His feelings for Bill had developed through their dreams and these feelings had been real. They had wasted a good amount of time until Dipper had come to terms with this fact. The nightmares weren’t any different.

And now he was scared. He hated it but it was no use to play it down.

But the kiss had felt good. The nightmares scared Dipper but they didn’t extinguish how he felt about Bill. Like a gust of cold air in a stuffy hot room and a sip of hot coffee after walking through cold rain all the same, Bills kiss had felt so nice.

He loved Bill. That didn’t change. They just needed to get past this. Dipper started walking again. Maybe he even knew how.

 

Bill found Will far sooner than he had expected. He would’ve run past him if he hadn’t stopped at the sound of sniffing.

He turned around and spotted Will, his back pressed to a wall overgrown with vines, partly hidden between the plants.

He stepped closer, unsure what to do.

Seeing his brother again like this reminded him of the parts he had forgotten over time, especially how much he disliked that Will broke into tears about everything. He used to claim that he couldn’t help it, but how could you have a serious talk with someone who was crying? Bill always looked like the villain because of it.

Fine, this wasn’t going to change now.

“Will..? Could we talk?” He tried to keep his voice low. Will startled anyway, lowering his hands from his face and stared at him with wide, red-rimmed eyes.

After a moment, Will tried to straighten himself and stepped out of his hiding spot. Bill waited a little longer until his breathing calmed down, staring down the path he had come. Everything he had worried about the whole day was pressing forward into his thoughts but he tried to ignore it. He could see Pine Tree stepping around the corner in the distance, but he didn’t come closer.

Finally, Will spoke up and pulled Bills attention back to him.

“So, that was embarrassing.” He laughed, weakly, barely trying to joke before he dropped that act as well, his face going blank.

Bill huffed and crossed his arms. He tried his best not to mock his sibling. It was Wills fault for being so easy to taunt.

“Listen, it was an accident that we met today but... I don’t think it’s a bad thing.”

Will looked up at him, his eyes shining again.

“Really...?”

Bill looked at him sternly. “You didn’t make it easy for me to get in touch with you. Did you take mothers name? Do you know how hard it is to find someone named ‘Will Smith’?”

A tiny little smile appeared on Wills face. Was he mocking him? Bill was both offended and a little proud.  “Yeah, Mom and Dad divorced soon after you left and I stayed with Mom.”

Bill hesitated.

“How are you doing?” he asked sincerely.

Will looked surprised again. “Oh, me? I thought you’d ask about Mom and Dad.”

Bill rolled his eyes and looked around before he forced himself to make eye contact again.

“I’d ask them if I wanted to know, and I’m asking you about you. So?”

Will stared at him and it was a little unsettling. His voice was small when he answered.

“I’m fine.” Then he tears were back. “I always hoped you’d show up someday. Oh god.” He rubbed his face with his sleeves again. Bill sighed. Will should be an adult now but look at him. Nothing had changed.

“Well then, why did you make such a scene if you wanted to see me?”

Will took a deep breath to calm himself, looking upset again. “Because you denied it! But.. I guess it was just the truth.” He looked Bill over. “So you and Dipper.. “

They grew silent. Bill looked back into the direction he’d seen Dipper stand, but he was gone.

“How.. how are you doing?” Will mirrored his question.

Bill looked at him and thought about it.

“I’m doing good.”

He could see Will swallow. “Dipper said you were sick?” he looked confused, looking Bill over for any sign of illness. Bill was baffled for a second. Why would Dipper say that? But suddenly it dawned to him. “Oh, that. Yes. I’ve not been sleeping well. I guess that’s what he meant.” He would have a word with Dipper later. Hopefully.

“Is.. is it your thing? Or did it stop?”

Bill stared him down, his lips pressed into a thin line.

“No.” he said pointedly, “my thing didn’t stop.”

Will looked away.

“Ok.”

They grew silent again.

“Does Dipper know about it?”

Bill closed his eyes, trying hard not to snap.

“Yes.” He said it unnerved but Will relaxed at his answer. Then he started crying again.

“I’m so glad... I can’t believe you are alright,” he hiccupped and it was the last thing Bill had expected.

He hated it when Will cried but weirdly enough he seemed to cry for him now, and even if that really wasn’t necessary, Bill found it easier to hug Will when he wasn’t doing it because he had the jitters.

 

Dipper waited at the end of the wall, playing with his phone. It was a hot day and he didn’t know how much longer he could stand waiting. He was about to send Bill a meeting point for later when the man in question stepped out of the footpath and towards him, alone.

He looked positively done. Dipper smiled weakly.

“Thank you for waiting.” Bill looked hesitant. Dipper pushed his phone into the back of his jeans and smiled carefully. Bill eyed him, his whole face a question but he rambled on. “Will said he’d talk to you tomorrow.”

Dipper nodded, even if he had already decided to skip classes the next day. Bill frowned at him. “What’s up with you? You have the weirdest look on your face.”

“We need to talk.”

Bill blinked at him, looking alarmed.

“What? Is it because of the nightmares?”

Dipper looked away. “Yes, it’s not that hard to guess is it. Anyway, I was thinking...”

“No.” Bill interrupted him, taking him by his arms. Dipper blinked, breathing in. There was an urgency on Bills face and even if he already knew that Bill got the wrong idea, the look he was giving him still rolled into Dippers stomach like hot lava.

He smiled weakly. And before Dipper could laugh or explain, Bill kissed him.

Not carefully or crude like before. He kissed him with fervor and Dipper melted.

He tried to push him away to clear the misunderstanding but Bill wasn’t having any of it, his hands pressed flat against Dippers back. Dipper could not move him an inch. His lips were sealed against his, kissing him with an urgency that almost had Dipper slip, almost made him forget that there was something to talk about.

He hit Bills shoulder before he stopped fighting altogether and lunged for him instead. Bill almost swayed backwards at the missing resistance but Dipper didn’t give him much time to react, opening his lips against Bills as he pulled him down by his neck.

They kissed for seconds or minutes, half hidden by the vines. When Bills shoulders relaxed under Dipper fingers, he placed his hands on Bills face carefully, thumbs brushing his cheeks before he pushed him away gently. This time Bill let go.

“I’m not breaking up with you, stupid.”

“No, I’m not having any of this! Wait what?” Bill blinked, looking flustered.  “Oh.”

Dipper smiled again.

“But I think we should go see Ford.”

 


	14. To the Falls

“Aren’t you coming to bed?”

A shriek escaped Dipper, loud enough to have his ears burn with embarrassment. He squinted into the darkness of the living room. Blinded by the glaring light of his screen he could barely see Bill. By now it was the only light source in the room except the faint light of the street lights outside. He hadn’t bothered to turn on the lights.

Bill sounded suspicious and Dipper swallowed, mouth suddenly dry. He had done his best to ignore the clock in the corner of his laptop screen, no matter how much the sleepiness pulled on his limbs. Bills couch was too comfortable to get up anyway.

Ok, maybe he had anticipated browsing until he fell asleep here. He hadn’t made a conscious decision to avoid the bed, Bills bed, but he knew he was dreading it.

“No, it’s fine, I’ll join you later,” he tried and looked back onto the screen. Maybe the blue light would mask his red lying face. Yesterday he was wished himself back into Bills bed over everything else and now he didn’t want to go near it.

While he had barely seen Bills face he had noticed how his hair was sticking up. He had probably already slept a little since he had excused himself to bed hours ago. He could hear Bill sigh. “It’s 2 a.m. and you have to drive tomorrow morning.” Dipper didn’t react but Bill had a point. He didn’t want to drive several hours with tired eyes.

Bill stayed where he was and Dipper cast down his eyes.

“If you don’t want to, just say so.” Bills voice was laced with disappointment. A small part of Dipper grew annoyed with the immature touch to his voice but he fought it down. Yes, he could just tell Bill that he was afraid of dreaming again. But he didn’t know how to phrase it without sounding like he was afraid of Bill as well.

Even after the kisses in the afternoon sun, their evening had been a rollercoaster of emotions and discussions. They both suffered from their unruly sleep pattern over the last days and it wasn’t doing the best for their patience or moods.

Against his initial agreement Bill was not fully convinced to see Ford. In his eyes, seeking the help of a monster hunter was questionable. Dipper was beyond annoyed since Bill always complained that no one believed in the supernatural but now didn’t want to consult someone who was experienced with it. But on the other side Bill was just as keen to visit Gravity Falls as Dipper was and shared his quiet but giddy excitement. Dipper longed to get a little rest from everyday life in the drowsy atmosphere there. A few of their dreams had taken place in the small town and even in their exhausted stupor they couldn’t help but give each other little smiles at the memories.

Dipper gnawed at his lip. There was no point in acting like he wasn’t ready to hit a pillow. Bill knew exactly how tired he was.

“No, that’s not it. It’s just…,” he took a breath but no words came to him. The pause was growing too long. He shook his head and gave up. “Ok. I’m coming.” His stomach dropped with his words.  Slowly he placed his laptop to the side. Once it clicked shut the room was completely in the dark. His eyes still needed time to get used to the darkness but he got up. Before he could make a step forward, Bill took a step back.

“I think there’s something I should tell you, Pine Tree.”

Dipper forgot to breath and flat out stared at Bill. For a second everything tilted. A fear flared up within his chest that Bills personality from the nightmares latched into him in reality. He had never considered that a possibility but for a split second, the thought rushed into his head. But he blinked and as his eyes grew accustomed to the dark all he saw in front of him was Bill, pouty and moody but still his idiot boyfriend. He could see it in his eyes.

Dipper shut his mouth tighter, swallowed and just waited for what Bill had to say, skipping complaining about the nickname for once. It made him so helplessly angry that Bill would still use it but it also took the wind out of his sails. Bill watched him and relaxed slightly when Dipper didn’t speak up. Dipper wanted to punch him for it.

“You know, I told you I’ve never dreamed myself, only other people’s dreams. But these…”, he stared into Dipper eyes, unwavering, “..these nightmares. I think they are my dreams.”

For a second Dipper grew confused why Bill brought his lack of own dreams up again but then he understood. He let go of a breath.

“What makes you think that?” he replied in a quiet voice.

Bill looked at him, his mouth stretched into a displeased line. “It just feels like it. It’s different.” He looked down onto his hands, twisted them together. “If it weren’t for my behavior towards you in them I wouldn’t consider them nightmares.”

Dipper had an idea where this was going. He knew Bill seemed to think that he wasn’t human but something evil pressed into a human shape, evil because he didn’t mind the insanity. And maybe it was the scariest part of the nightmares that he could recognize Bill in the monster he had met. A sharp sense of humor, just twisted into something ugly and cruel. A charmer all the same, but devoid of all empathy. But it bothered him that Bill missed the key differences. He stepped closer to him.

“That’s the point, isn’t it? Maybe this comes from you. But do you want to hurt me?”

Bill shook his head right away, looking back to Dippers face. Dipper smiled and lifted a hand to place it on Bills face. Bill froze for a moment. Then he shut his eyes and leaned his cheek into the touch.

“And this feels nice, right.” Dipper murmured. “And this.” He leaned closer and pressed a kiss to the corner of Bills mouth. Bill opened his eyes a little and looked back at him.

“The only things that make those dreams nightmares is that you want to hurt me. I don’t mind the rest I guess. It’s ... really weird but I don’t mind.”

Bill eyes flickered and he looked away. They stayed silent for a while. Maybe Bill had expected a fight. He had been bold for sure, acting so strange all evening. Dipper stayed close to him. He just wanted Bill to hug him and pull him to bed. Slowly, he let his head roll against Bills shoulder. He couldn’t tell if this was a moment for affections or not but he was too tired to care anymore. He stifled a yawn.

“I’ll stay awake so you can sleep.” Bills voice was steady when he spoke but Dippers head shot back up in surprise. Bill nodded at him, still pondering. “You did it for me, I can do the same for you. I can sleep in the car tomorrow.” Dipper scowled a little at the reminder that Bill had in fact no driver’s license but relief flooded through him and he wrapped his arms around his neck and buried his face there. He felt too guilty to thank him for it, but Bill gave an amused huff against his ear and pulled him to bed. It felt like a truce.

-

Dipper had the drive to Gravity Falls all planned out. They were on the road with a rented car at seven in the morning and they should arrive at four in the afternoon. He had planned where they would take breaks and packed lunch and snacks. It was foolproof. Except that they were already behind their schedule by noon.

Up until then the drive was a quiet affair. Bill fell asleep on the highway almost immediately and Dipper couldn’t blame him, the last night had been a little too much. He only stirred when Dipper pulled over for lunch. He needed a break now, not when he reached the planned spot. He parked the car on a large rest area and sighed deeply when the engine died down, sinking into his seat. The driving was tiring him out more than he had expected. Another thing not going according to plan.

Beside him Bill stifled a yawn and when Dipper looked over to him he was turned away, looking out of his window.

“You should get a license, you know?” Dipper mused and Bill turned around to look at him, his eyes still heavy with sleep. “Why?” he asked, irritated.

Dipper knitted his brows together. “So I don’t have to drive the whole way next time?”

A sullen look fell over Bills face and he turned away again. Dipper stared at him, his heart clenched a little. There was a hint of ‘who said there would be a next time’ hanging between them.

“What’s wrong?”

Bill shrugged. He was slumped towards the window. Dipper couldn’t see his face like this.  “I just don’t know what you expect to happen when we get there.”

There it was again. Dipper rolled his eyes and grabbed behind Bills seat to pull out the bag of bagels they had brought along.

“I don’t know what _you_ expect. You act like I’m driving you to your personal execution. Ford won’t do anything to you.” He pulled Bills bagel out and placed it on his thigh, too fed up to wait for him to take it. “Sorry that I’m trying to find something that helps us. Do you want to turn back around?”

He took a big bite out of his own bagel to shut himself up even though the anger in his guts was erasing all of his appetite.

Bill took his food but didn’t eat. He moved slightly and Dipper could see his face again, but he didn’t look at Dipper but kept staring ahead instead. “Why won’t you tell me what you expect your uncle to do then?” he bristled but didn’t comment on Dippers jibe otherwise. Dipper chewed and took his time before he swallowed and spoke again.

“I hope he can tell us what your powers are, and then we can maybe determine what causes the nightmares?” Ok, maybe Dipper hadn’t been precise about it before but he didn’t know what to expect either.

They sat in silence for a while, Dipper eating and Bill holding his food, alternating between looking through the windshield and the side window, clearly on edge. Dipper let him mull over it for a while before he got fed up.

“For fucks sake, Bill. Just tell me, even when you can’t put it nicely.”

Bill finally looked at him again.

“You want to fix me now?” It broke out if him and he looked uneasy, the shadows under his eyes underlined his wariness.

Dipper frowned, shaking his head lightly, his eyes not leaving Bills. “What do you mean, ‘fix’. The dreams altogether?”

Bill huffed and looked down, his shoulders tense. Dipper shook his head again, this time in disbelief. “Why would I? There’s no need to. I’d rather not.”

Bill let go of a shaky breath and nodded barely. Dipper stayed silent for a while, not sure if Bill was finished. He wasn’t. “You don’t want to find a way to shut down the dreams so you can break up. Right?”

The accusation hit Dipper without warning, even if he had told Bill to speak his mind. Yes, Bills had assumed that Dipper wanted to end their relationship the day before but hadn’t they cleared that up already? He gaped.  “I’m taking you to meet my family and you think I want to break up?”

Bill avoided his eyes and his voice pitched a little. Dipper barely ever saw him this distraught. The fatigue had worn down his poise visibly. “You know as well as I do that we can’t stop the dreams even if we want to. If you wanted to break up it would make it harder.”

Dipper stared at him. Bill had a point, he knew what he was trying to say, but still.

“I don’t have any intentions to break up with you,” he said weakly, his brain failing to catch up but struggling to get his point across. “I just want to sleep with you again. I mean, sleep again.” Heat crept up his neck and he looked down at his food. “At the same time.”

The corners of Bills lips twitched the tiniest bit but nodded. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

Dipper took a breath. “You know, you sound a little backwards there,” he mused and started eating again, “do you want to keep the dreams beyond control so I don’t get any ideas?”

Bill scowled at him. “You know I didn’t mean it that way.” Dipper raised his eyebrows at him, feigning doubt. Bill narrowed his eyes at him.

“You are not getting rid of me that easily. I still prefer if you aren’t trying to, thought.”

Bill started to eat and Dipper smiled for the first time since they had set off.

-

It took two more hours before Dipper lost it. His determination of the morning dissolved into swearing at the bad traffic, the road in general and why was the weather so bad. All conversation had died down at this point and Dipper was just ready to arrive, but their destination was still two hours away. And most of the way ahead of them consisted just this one endless highway.

The traffic had cleared up now and the cruise control on speed limit, leaving Dipper with little to do. The anger had drained him and he leaned his head against his hand. His eyes stayed glued to the road to keep the car on the never-ending street. There was nothing to do but stick it out.

Bills pulled him from his dim thoughts with a warm hand on his knee and his frown softened a tad. The little circles he  and glanced over to Bill who sat snug to his seat, observing Dipper.

Bill was watching him with heedful eyes. His look was far from innocent.

The smile slipped off Dippers face when Bills hand started to wander up his leg, fingertips caressing the inside of his tights and he jerked upright in his seat, almost swinging off the road right then and there. He snapped his eyes back to the road, the scare pricking his skin like needles.

“What are you doing!?” he hissed quietly. There was no need to keep his voice down but he couldn’t help it. His eyes stayed on road, his heart still hammering not only from the slight swerve. He could feel Bills eyes bore holes into the side of his face and his fingertips digging lightly into Dippers flesh. His hand just kept crawling higher. Dipper held his breath, only to pant it out seconds later. Did Bill really want to start something now?

“We are on the road!” he said a little louder, trying to sound upset. Bills hand still rested too close to his lap for him to think straight. Was Bill bored? That was the least reason Dipper wanted to be touched for.

He thought Bill would retort but instead his hand moved and gently pressed against Dippers crotch. Dipper choked.

“Do you want me to stop?” Bills voice sounded earnest. Dipper could see him look down out of the corner of his eyes.

Dipper squirmed in his seat. He was already way to riled up to deny that he was into this, stupid as it was. He eyed the road while he tried to sort his mind. He wanted to ask why Bill suddenly did this, wanted to talk about it. But there was a slight chance that Bill might stop and Dipper knew, he knew that that was exactly why he should say something but he did not want Bill to stop. Dipper swallowed, his thoughts way to jumbled to make any kind to logical decision. He tried to judge how hard the traffic would be to manage but there was hardly anything going on around them.

The way Bill had looked at him was what he wanted.

“Well.. we.. never do anything,” he stammered lamely and grabbed the steering wheel tighter.

He could hear Bill unbuckle his seatbelt and with that lips pressed against Dippers neck. “We can do something now.” Bills voice was close and a jolt rushed up Dippers spine.The hand against his crotch squeezed lightly and Dipper couldn’t hold back a gasp. “We don’t have to though,” he mumbled, careful and the tiniest bit flustered. It calmed Dippers nerves down a bit.

“Just.. keep your seatbelt on?” he croaked and he didn’t dare to look over to Bill. Lips pressed against his neck again, just below his ear, gentler this time. Then he was gone and Dipper eyed him out of the corner of his eye as he put his seatbelt back on, adjusted so he could sit sideways but it was better than nothing.

“Just keep your eyes on the road.”

Dipper rushed to do so and fixed his eyes on the road. He still partly couldn’t believe that Bill was doing this. He flinched when Bill touched his wrist. They locked eyes for a second. Bills face was flushed just like Dippers own felt aflame. He let go of the steering wheel with one hand to give him space and rested his hand on Bills back instead, his eyes darting back to the road. He swallowed thickly as Bill opened his jeans and pushed them down just enough, his fingertips lingering against his hips. Dipper already questioned his ability to keep them on the road by the way heat rushed through his stomach and he stubbornly kept his eyes glued to the white markings on the concrete. It was hard not to look down, the blond hair barely in his field of vision. His eyes burned when he forgot to blink.

“Why are you doing this?” he wondered aloud, his fingers twitching. Bill hummed beside him.

“Because I want to, silly.”

One of Bills hands crept up his back to keep himself steady, fingertips barely shifting under the fabric of his shirt. His other hand pushed into his boxers, warm fingers wrapping around his base and without much ado, heat wrapped around him and Bills tongue pressed against him. Dipper moaned, his thighs jerking. It felt good. He couldn’t see what Bill was doing but it was hard not to let his head fall back against his seat and close his eyes. Warmth surrounded him, Bills hand on his back pressing into his flesh and Dipper stopped caring about the sounds he was making.

Bill couldn’t move much, his shoulders tense under Dippers hand. But his mouth and fingers caressed him without any rush and over the ludicrousness of the situation and distraction of the road, an irresistible warmth filled his senses.

Just as his vision started to blur slightly, he clenched his teeth and buried his fingers in Bills hair, shielding his skull from bumping against the steering wheel as he hit the brakes. Shaking, he maneuvered them onto the breakdown lane. Once the car came to a stop, Dipper stopped the engine and curled forward, panting hard. Bill had stilled, hot damp breath pushing against Dippers skin, but once the car stood still he moved again. Dipper gasped helplessly at the sensation. He pulled weakly on Bills hair to warn him but Bills only hummed around him and didn’t budge as Dipper came hard.

Dipper rested his forehead against the wheel and sucked air into his lungs like he had been drowning. Slowly he loosened his grip on Bills hair and Bill pushed to sit up. His lips were red and swollen and his hair was tousled. Without much thought Dipper wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him, licking into his mouth. He reached down for Bills crotch and his groping fingers relaxed when he felt Bills own erection straining against his jeans.

Bill grunted in weak protest but Dipper shook his head. “Shut up,” he whispered as he opened Bills zipper. He wrapped his hand around him and started to jerk him off, his face pressed against Bills shoulder as he slowly caught his breath while he listened to Bills breath hitch.

Once his own pulse had evened out a little he looked down at Bills erection, heavy in his hand while he stroked it, cupping the tip every once in a while, and dragging his thumb over it. Heat burned in his chest and he suppressed a snort that would be misunderstood too easily, not believing how much affection consumed him whilst he was doing that. He lifted his head and nestled his face against Bills neck, kissing the skin there and Bill moaned and came into his hand.

Dipper felt a little guilty for not returning the same favor and only finishing off Bill yet again, just like last time, but there would be other opportunities. Plenty. He would do something for him next time. Bills head rolled against his and they breathed together for a minute.

A quiet laugh bubbled up his throat and he shook his head lightly. “Why you, suddenly...”

“Suddenly?” Bill perked up and lifted his head but Dipper buried his face in his shoulder again and cursed quietly to himself. He wished he hadn’t said anything. But he also didn’t want this to pass and not talk about it properly, finally, even if it was technically a little late.

Before he could speak up Bill sighed, a little closer to him.

“Sorry. I guess I’ve hesitated too much.” He sounded unsure as well and it calmed Dipper down a little. It just felt better to know that he wasn’t the only one who was lost. He looked up and straightened himself. Bill was still leaning close, even if couldn’t be very comfortable, his eyes cast down in thought. His eyes always looked pretty up-close, Dipper caught himself thinking and he flushed.

“I didn’t know what was appropriate. I mean I knew you wanted to but...”

“You knew?!”

Bill looked up and Dipper stared fleetingly before his eyes darted away, his flush creeping up to his hairline.

Bill snorted. “Don’t look so surprised, you got handsy first and right away, too. And you kept complaining that we don’t do anything”

Dipper sputtered, absolutely shocked and positively burning now. “I never complained!”

“Oh right. You accused me. With your eyes. ‘Bill it’s been two days, why haven’t you bedded me yet?’”

Dipper opened his mouth but he was speechless. Ok, he changed his mind, he thought and closed his mouth again. He didn’t want to have this conversation anymore. Not when Bill was regaining his cockiness in a stride. His roaming eyes landed on his messy hand and he moved to open the glovebox to get a tissue but Bill beat him to it. He didn’t struggle much as Bill took his hand and cleaned it the best he could and it was sweet thing to do but he kept avoiding his eyes.

He forced a few breaths with clenched teeth.

“Well, if you knew then why didn’t you.”

Bill hummed by his side.

“I thought the timing had to be good.”

“And this is good timing?!”

Bill hummed again, his mumble barely audible. “Maybe I waited too long.”

Dipper looked up and wrangled with himself a bit because that was just plain wrong and he shrugged. “Not really, I get it.” A smile eased Bills face and Dipper couldn’t help but smile back. Bills smile only grew brighter. “Now let’s find a roadhouse to clean up and break some speed limits to catch up a bit.” Dipper groaned when he remembered their schedule. Fatigue washed over him and he grumbled, blatantly pitying himself.

“Come on, I’ll drive the rest of the way afterwards.”

Dipper blinked at him, puzzled. “You don’t have a license.”

Bill shrugged. “I can drive well enough and what are the odds that we are get pulled over.” At the face Dipper made he shook his head. “You driving like that is just as bad, you should take a nap.”

Dipper narrowed his eyes sulky because he couldn’t really argue with that. “You are really weird lately, you complain but at the same time you go out of your way to do the nicest things.” The words tumbled from his mind without much thought and a grin split Bills face. “I know I am great, sometimes it just comes over me.” Dipper groaned and wrapped his arms around Bills neck, feeling lighter than in days. Maybe they were going to be fine after all.

-

When he woke up the first thing he noticed were dark evergreen trees, rows and rows seaming the road and he knew in the blink of an eye that they had arrived. He stretched his numb limbs and spotted Bill standing outside, faced towards the forest. Dipper furrowed his brows. Was he taking a piss? That would be an excuse why he wouldn’t wake Dipper up. But Bill was looking around and that was just odd. All the trees looked the same.

Stretching again he got out of the car and leaned against it. “What are you doing?”

But before he had finished the question, Bill was moving and started walking straightforward into the forest. Dipper hesitated but when Bill threatened to disappear into the dull light between the trees, Dipper threw the car door shut and ran after him.

“Where are you going?!”

His own voice resounded in the forest. At the same time he could barely hear Bill since he didn’t turn as he spoke, he just kept walking briskly.

“I know this place. Somewhere around here…”

“What? No you don’t, what are you even saying?”

But he got no answer.

They passed some boulders and old trees, glades and trails. Some Dipper could recognize, they couldn’t be too far from the shack, but the forest had changed over the years and Dipper was slowly getting panicked that they would get lost at this rate as he tried to keep up, never quite catching up to Bill.

They were almost at another glade when Bill slowed down and Dipper grabbed his shoulder, holding him back.

“What the hell are you looking for?!”

He pulled on Bills shoulder but he couldn’t turn him around.

“It was here.”

Dipper winced back and pressed his hands to his own ears instead, watching Bills back in horror. It was Bills voice. But it was in his head. Reverberating in a weird way and he knew that sound, it was familiar. Finally, Bill moved to turn around. Dipper stumbled backwards, suddenly riddled with dread. He didn’t want to see it, the thing he feared the most. The eyes of his lover but with sharp lathy pupils.He was sure they would look like that and he couldn’t look away.

His foot was caught in a tree root and he fell, falling onto his butt. He squeezed his eyes shut for a second and as he forced them open -

He was back in the car.

The flinch that had shaken him from his sleep was still resonating in his body, still tense, and he blinked and panted, confused.

Bill was in the driver’s seat next to him, not outside. And he was eying him with the strangest look on his face.

“We’re here,” he said and Dipper grasped that he was repeating himself but he could only stare. He took a deep breath and nodded, looking outside. The shack was visible down the road. The dream clung to his mind but he kept his mouth shut because obviously, Bill hadn’t slept. A nightmare, nothing more. But he couldn’t shake off the dread.

“Ok,” he breathed, pulling himself together and unbuckling before Bill could ask a question. “Let’s go.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well kids don't try this at home.. or rather in your cars. Now the end is near /cackle


End file.
